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rules on marriage??
Does anyone know why sailors can or cant get married during A school?
get permission??
does it have anything to do with hard copy?
or next duty station???
why cant he get married if he is on leave after A school graduation and coming home for almost a month... b4 he goes to japan...
Views: 3300
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Anti M on
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I answered on the girlfriends group.
Here's a quick answer. They can marry during A school, they just need to run the special request chit. He can also marry while on leave. If he has orders already, she will not be added to them.
You mentioned elsewhere that he has orders to Japan. That country and the Navy have very specific rules who can go there as a dependent. Sailors who are E-3 and below are not authorized to take dependents overseas. Period. He can put in for a waiver, but they rarely get approved for Japan, and it goes command by command. She can't just move there, Japan requires a special visa for dependents. That's why she needs command sponsorship. Without that there is no SOFA visa, no housing, no cost of living adjustments to pay, minimal use of base facilities, and zero employment opportunities for her. The dollar is weak in Japan, crushingly expensive to live there.
They can be married, but she'll stay in the US. Sorry, it is a hard situation, no way around it.
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Permalink Reply by ProudNavyWifeFresca on
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Hey so im really grateful for your answers!!
What is CHIT? is it in relation to my next question.
what is command sponsorship?.
the recruiters said when he signed up they shouldn't get married because it would have put him in reserves. that to follow his career was more important.... they really wanted to but they didn't because they were worried it would happen. Since he is in A school now and got his hard copy what is the process from start to finish to get married before he goes to japan.
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A chit is a form he fills out. If she is going to where he is in A school to get married, then he needs to ask permission by filling out the form. They usually don't say no, but they do have requirements. They'll tell him what those are.
If he is just going to get married while on leave after A school he doesn't need to ask anyone. That does NOT mean she is going to Japan. It just means they are married and she will get the usual dependent benefits (healthcare, housing allowance, ID card).
Command sponsorship means the new command agrees to pay for and be responsible for the dependent and their move. America has an agreement with Japan that military dependents will be identified by the military, and will reside in Japan with special visas. It also means the base will extend overseas benefits and use of the base.
The bad news is he has to be an E-4 or above to take her to Japan, and they had to be married BEFORE he received his orders. Once they are married now, if he is an E-4, he can ask for her to be command sponsored. Most of the time, this is NOT approved. Without permission from his new ship (command sponsorship), she will live in the US and he will serve his tour in Japan. Sorry, he will be a "geographical bachelor", meaning a married sailor who is stationed without the spouse.
I don't know about the reserves thing, although the number of dependents matters.
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hey so shes not planning on going with him, they just want to get married when he comes home?
can he get in trouble for getting married period?????
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Yes, they can marry. No, he won't get in trouble. He'd only get in trouble if he were at A school and went against the rules by not asking permission. On leave, he's between commands and marrying is the right of American adults. He might get a talking to when he gets to the ship, but he isn't breaking any rules.
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alright, ill talk to him, and ill see what i can do. im going to go to a another recruit office and see what i can do, my son is stubborn and he is afraid to make the wrong move but he wont listen to his girl.. so i wish there was someone i could get to talk to him and make him understand that they are not being fully truthful with him........thanks
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At this point, a recruiter has nothing to do with him. I was a petty officer first class and stationed in Japan for 12 years. I do know how this works.
But if he is reluctant, don't push him too hard. It has to be his decision.
Best of luck.
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o wow, that was the anwsers to my prayers! petty officer, he was telling me that he has to earn stripes, and that if he were to go to japan he would get E 5 pay and hazordutis pay, but when others ask, and they say wait what that dosnt make sense, im sitting here going what on earth are they telling him in great lakes. my poor DIL, to be, she is so upset, she is handling it well, strong girl, very motivated and she hates being lied to, they really have been trying to get married way b4 he signed up but they convinced them not to with threats and stuff so i dont know what to tell her.... he tells me he wants to marry her and he would if he could 2mrrow, so i dont understand. i want this to make sense, and we all want to learn the navy life. but she is getting a rough start when someone is not sending the right information to him... or he is getting it mixed up. he is taking it to seriously. is there anything else you could explain about marriage laws , or anything you can think of? thank you!
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He may be getting bad information.
What paygrade is he now? Do you know? Will he be an E-4 out of school? And getting E-5 or E-5 pay simply for going to Japan makes no sense at all. We have thousands of sailors there, they get their basic pay and regular allowances. If he is going to a ship, he'll get sea pay when they're deployed, and there are other special pays if the ship goes into combat zones. Not sure if the shipboard sailors get the cost of living adjustment.
Sometimes a new sailor hears things from other new sailors, or from guys with more time in the Navy, but no experience with overseas orders. We call them "sea lawyers" and they often get the details wrong.
I was a petty officer, I've been out for some time. I do have a married sailor living in Atsugi, so I'm up on current policy.
The Navy has no "laws" regarding marriage. They do have regulations about how many dependents a recruit can have while enlisting. (Two, a spouse and a child). They can advise a sailor not to marry, but they cannot prevent a marriage unless it is an illegal union.
But now he is a sailor, he can get married. Yes, he is supposed to inform his command beforehand, and training commands are very strict about that. But when he's on leave, hey, he is to yet attached to a command! So if he and she are adults, and both US citizens, and she doesn't have some horrible criminal past or tons of debt.... then they can go ahead and marry. What the Navy can and will do is not be able to let her move overseas. She wasn't a spouse when the orders were issued. He has orders overseas as a single sailor, that won't change. But he can get married.
It will be darn difficult on them, but if they hang in there for a few years, it can work.
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