New & Full of Questions!

[beewoman]

Hey! I am new to this website and Navy journey! My fiance and I have been together for over a year and he just left for basic November 19th. I would have to say it is defintely one of the hardest things I am doing in my life and have done! I am leaning on God for full strength because by myself I would just not be strong enough! Planning a wedding by myself is not what I have always planned to do, but when you love someone so much you are willing to do whatever it takes to be supportive. I am full of questions as far as when PIR comes what do I need to expect? I do know he will be leaving for Florida for his A School; therefore, I am not sure if I will get to spend much time with him following graduation? When he is done with graduating from my understanding I can give him his cell at the airport before he leaves for A school in order for us to communicte, correct? How is life afterwards it is hard, fun, exciting, scary? I am just open for all advice and ears are open!

THANKS!

[BrittSailorWife<3]

Hi! me and my fiance have been together over a year as well, and he also left the 19th! i was planning the wedding by myself but he wanted to help so we put the BIG wedding on hold, and are just gonna get married while he is in A school at the court house! Yes once you go to the airport you are able to give him his phone, And since im new as well i was told that he will get liberty at PIR until at least 10pm and the next day they will fly out, im in the same boat my fiance is going to Florida for school but luckily i live in Florida! I hope i can help a little seeing im new too(:

[ProudNavyGf81 (Ship 11 Div 319)]

Well, I went through all of this in August. My bf's PIR was the first weekend in Oct and he too went on to Pensacola FL for A school. I had about 7 or 8 hours with him once graduation was over, and then he had to report back. They left for the airport in the middle of the night. But ended up having liberty the next day until his flight left. I didn't know he was going to have Liberty so I wasn't able to spend those extra hours with him, I was so upset! So I'm just giving you a heads up that your bf will probably go through the same thing. So be ready to make a trip to the airport the next morning! My bf flew out of Midway which is down in the city. So you'll have a little bit of a drive if your bf is flying out of the same one. He'll be able to tell you when you see him. 

Once he is in A school communication between you too will be amazing! Having his phone is going to make all the difference. And if he has a laptop tell him he needs to take it school. My bf and I skyped all the time while he was there. That helps a lot too! 

Other than that, just be proud of him and make sure he knows it! Write him a letter everyday, it's the only thing they have to look forward to in basic.

Hope that helps!

-Emily

[beewoman]

Thank you Emily that helps a ton :) just anxious to see him and all he has accomplished.
Britney

[meagan5220]

as far as PIR goes, it was a great experience. Your fiance will know the week or so before when he will actually leave. Some sailors leave early saturday am. My sailor didnt leave until the tuesday after his PIR. So be prepared for either way. Even though he stayed til tuesday we could still only have the weekend with him even though he stayed a few days after. What is his rate going to be? Yes you can give him his stuff at the airport if you get the chance to meet up with him there. Life afterwards is an adventure... If you have any specific questions I can give you some tips on specifics... lol my biggest tip is to be prepared for things to change all the times, and always expect the unexpected. There are sooo many things to tell ya, I told one girl that I could go on all day about Navy stuff but doesnt always mean it will apply to you because even the smallest detail can mean that any advice I gave you could be null and void. lol!! But if you have any questions def dont hesitate to ask either here or feel free to PM if I can help I will try. :)

[beewoman]

@meagan5220 Thanks so much for great adive. It helps relieve some stress. Were you and your sailor engaged when he left for bootcamp and if so how did the affect you having a wedding in comparsion to not if so? His ranking will be E-3 coming out of bootcamp from there I assume you can take a test at some point to become E-4. His A school is only 3 weeks long due to him doing an apprenticship for 6 months with airman. I am not sure what that will mean for us, but I do know he is going to ask for a time of leave following his A school in hopes to spend time together and get all our stuff together to finally be together again! Please let me know anything because I am new and could use all sorts of tips!

Thanks!

[meagan5220]

Yes we were engaged when he left. :) lol our wedding was in a courthouse in Pcola, and honestly I looked like a hooker. lol Mostly bc we were supposed to get married friday of the week I got there... well I left my place Sunday night drove 15 hours straight through, checked into a hotel and got a call saying come pick me up now we have to get married asap. we had about 45 minutes to go pick him up and get to the courthouse so I was wearing a pair of jean shorts and a tank top lol. but we got it. My husband was supposed to be E2 coming out of BC.. his rdc "lost" his paperwork and never made an effort to find it pretty much told him he didnt care. He can take a test to class up to E4 it will depend on his eval and how many of that rate they will take that round. Its a tough situation you are in mostly because waiting til after a school will mean he will have unaccompanied order which means they wont pay to move you and opens up the possibility of getting overseas orders. I think if he is undes ?? which is what I am getting the vibe he is then they find out their orders in BC. so that will be helpful if that is the case for you to prepare.

[beewoman]

@meagan5220 What you are saying is after A school leaves the possibility of opening up overseas orders rather than staying in the Country because you are married? Correct? It would be awesome if we could have a wedding and get married in A school, but I know I am dreaming. Like I said earlier his A school is only 3 weeks because he took an aprenticship job rather than a direct job; thereore, it is basically like job shadowing different jobs for 6months and then he decides. I am okay if we have to while he is in A school in Penscola, but if we could wait until right after that would be great too. You are thinking it could be a possibility he could find out where he will be stationed during bootcamp? Sorry so many quesitons. If we do have to do a courthouse in Penscola how did you go about as preparing cause i have read where many women are taking a course prior to therefore they dont have to wait the three day period. Is that only if you are a resident because I am not...how are things now for you two where are you stationed and how is the Navy lifestyle?

[meagan5220]

from the sounds of it he is doing undes.(I dont know a ton about that rate but I know a little) So typically the way it works (from what I have been told and seen from a friend's husband) is they go to BC and a few weeks before the end of it they find out where they will be stationed. Due to him finding out order in BC there would be no way for you to get a paid move and he would have the possibility of getting stationed overseas. Just because you are married doesnt mean he wouldnt get orders overseas they just try not to for the married guys E3 and under. But I am thinking that this might not even matter since he will probably get his orders in A school. In that case my friends husband got to write down where he wanted to go. He got what he wanted. He chose Norfolk though so since that has a bunch of openings typically he got it. Her husband struck for his rate with only going to look at one job lol.

 

So I am thinking (please dont take my word 100% lol I could be wrong or they could change things.) that he will probably get orders in BC which would mean it wouldnt matter if you got married in A school except you would get paperwork started sooner and he could hopefully get the BAH kicked in before reporting to his first duty station. It can take some time. In the mean time def start saving :) If you do end up getting married in pcola you dont need the course unless you or your fiance are FL residents. They do ask that everyone read some book they have a link to online from the county clerks office... but honestly it wasnt too much info.. I mean I guess its good for people who have never thought about the normal things to think about such as finances, kids, etc. But nothing super new.

 

I currently live in Virginia sort of by Norfolk. Honestly Navy life is good and bad. I hate that we have been screwed over so many times and have no real way to get anything sorted out. I like that we have good insurance, and a steady paycheck but I knew the Navy lifestyle wouldnt be my type of life and I knew my husband wouldnt like it lol he is such a homebody. He misses home too much. He also has done very very little of his job. Even when he was on deployment he barely did his job because they had AMs on the ship and with the squadrons so the squadrons AMs did most of the plane work. He would enjoy it more if he had been able to do his job more. I would probably like it more if his supervisors didnt like to play games, games that even pulled me into it. Lying saying they called to tell me stuff and I didnt tell him or telling him that I wasnt allowed to move somewhere. So its been a little bit of a mess but otherwise I like seeing new places. It sucks moving with my career because I cant really finish my grad school here, and getting a job for my career without my masters is pretty hard in Virginia, if I was back home in Oklahoma I could have gotten a job a lot easier because I had contacts and they accepted more people without masters and then helped to pay for your masters and stuff. I really like Virginia but honestly we arent staying with the Navy after this enlistment. lol

[BrittSailorWife<3]

What did you have to do to get married in Pcola? That is my plan when my fiance gets to A school!

[meagan5220]

Well since I wasnt a FL resident and my husband wasnt we didnt have much to do. Pretty much he has to route a chit to get married (no matter how many people tell him he doesnt, he does. Multiple people told my husband not to do it and then we almost didnt get married because a chief found out. so make sure he does that. and takes care of any marriage courses they have him do)

then I drove down to FL and took the needed paperwork with me and we went to the local courthouse (gotta be there by four so plan it accordingly) Filled out the application, said we read the little book paid about $130 and then got married. lol I think you need your birth certificate and maybe your social sec. card. or maybe just your DL they have a list of things they need on their website. google escambia county marriage license I think it is. Then I stayed extra days so we could get me and ID and get my tricare and stuff taken care of. You might need to leave your BC and ss card with him so he can add you to his page 2. My husband didnt need it but I know people that have.

 

umm I think thats it. If I forgot anything please feel free to ask away :)

[Anti M]

Plus, Navy policies can change overnight!

[meagan5220]

yes they do!