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Clueless and concerned
Ok...so my fiancé is leaving for bootcamp Feb. 9. I can handle that no problem. Then training in Fla, during which time I was told we could get married?? We really need to get married asap so I can go with him. (without orders I can't leave because of my daughter) When he get's orders I need to get a lawyer so I can petition the court to let me leave with him...I'm worried it will take months just to get a court date. I don't know anyone who's ever had this situation before. I have no idea what happens after training. A boat? How long do they usually leave for? We have been together for 8 years and known one another for at least 10 or 11, so I'm not worried about our relationship, just the paperwork bit. Any help/advice would be greatly appreciated!
-Tricia
Views: 322
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by AbigaeLanai on
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Hi Tricia,
Yea you can get married during his A school training in Florida all he will have to do is put in a special request chit requesting permission to do so. But there really shouldn't be a reason why they wouldn't approve his request.
Also after school he could either get sea duty and go to a boat, which the time on the boat varries. Some boats stay in dock for repairs and don't go to sea, so go to sea more than others it just depends. Or he could go to shore duty and then he would just stay where he's stationed for however long they assign him to that location.
I hope this helps! :) -
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Permalink Reply by Tricia on
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It's reassuring to hear! Just a good deal of uncertainty involved it waiting for his station after school. I just hope I can get him to remember to put in the request! It's a lot to handle all at once. I just hope if he gets stationed somewhere else I can get a court date quickly.
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Permalink Reply by Anti M on
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What rating/job did he sign up for? Schools vary in length, and there are some ratings taught in Florida which have very little sea duty, and others which have more chances to be deployed. It would be helpful to know if he's going aviation or one of the intelligence ratings (CT).
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I know he's going to Florida for training and I only know his job made me laugh because the initials were BM...teehee....like (bowel movement) I don't think those are the initials it's classified by, but it's still a little funny. All I know is 6 weeks in the Great Lakes and 6 weeks in Pensacola. I've never known anyone in the navy.. just army and air force around here, so I don't know what jobs do what. I feel completely clueless about everything. I've just been trying to help him prep as best he can...and pack. I have to move while he's gone so things are pretty messy.
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Aviation Boatswains Mate? Yes, short school, about 5 to 6 weeks. He'll be going to a squadron or a carrier, his first set of orders will almost certainly be sea duty. Doesn't mean he will BE at sea full time, but do expect deployments. No telling how many or when this early.
They do tell them not to marry on PIR weekend, but with your circumstances, I would encourage you to try. They probably will not reprimand him if a child is involved. You can get the license on Friday, marry early Saturday morning if he is staying in Great Lakes. I'd be leery of trying to get to Florida before the orders are cut. If you are not on the orders, you can still go live with him in the US (overseas is different), the Navy just doesn't give you a paid move. With a short school, orders are issued quickly, so you to need to be proactive.
Google "Lake County IL marriage license" for marrying in Great Lakes.
Good luck and let us know how it goes!
Wait... Feb 9? GO GET MARRIED NOW. Tell his recruiter to deal with it.
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He has to sign papers every few weeks saying he won't change ANYTHING...no tattoos...no nothing. They will pull him from his slot and make him go through the whole sign up process again. I don't have time for that crap. It took forever to get all the paperwork done...I CANNOT move anywhere without order and a court date because my daughter, while she has lived with him her whole life, calls him Papa and hasn't known anything else, is not his actual daughter. Her biological father will refuse for her to leave and I can't move farther than 50 miles without his permission. Yay Virginia.... so I need MY name on HIS orders to even get the court date. Hence the rush getting married.
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His recruiter can handle this if he wants to. Ask. Explain the situation. They always try to scare the potential recruits.
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If you are really sure...I can give it a shot. The worst he can say is no. It would be nice to get married here and not in Florida
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It truly shouldn't hurt to ask. Best wishes, you're in a difficult position.
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Permalink Reply by woodrose on
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I wouldn't count on him getting a lot of opportunities to do so you will probably have to wait till he has leave which may not be for a while! My brother didn't take leave for a year. Nothing is concrete you get used to not knowing whats going on and just waiting to do anything until the last minute. Sorry if that wasn't much help lol my husband is in Navy and I am currently wanting to have another baby and I never get the chance to you know get it started lol.
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Permalink Reply by proudwife2015 on
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My husband is in boot camp right now and we got married on November. I will be moving to Pensacola with him after he gets out. If you do end up getting married I would start looking at the area now because there is no guarantee that you will live on base and there is no guarantee that he will be able to live with you. He will have weekends off but during the week you might be on your own. Let me know what you end up doing. Maybe when you get there we can hang out :)
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It was my understanding that even if we got married when he's in school or boot camp that I wouldn't be able to go with him until he gets stationed somewhere. So basically I would be getting married over a weekend and then coming home to VA until he gets orders. Is that right? Or am I operating under a false assumption??
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