Working the System...

[Kaye S.]

As far as the "messed up orders" are concerned, as much as we love the Navy, remember the American military is THE LARGEST BUREAUCRACY IN THE WORLD! Most of us adults have learned through years of tough experience how to deal with bureaus, but our kids have not. They are used to dealing mostly with schools, where eventually the mess straightens itself out because the paperwork exists to get them graduated and out (and Mom will always step in and solve the problem). They don't know how to advocate for themselves.

First:
He is held responsible for what his orders say, NOT what someone told him they say. Just like you are responsible for what the mortgage contract says, not what the realtor says. Sailors are issued paper copies of their orders... did he read it throughly? Orders are also posted online (BUPERS)... did they agree with the paper copy? If they EVER don't agree, they must be sorted out BEFORE departure. It's in the present school/base's interest to get him processed and out, so they'll work harder on this.

Second:
Teach them to attack an "elephant" on all four legs, tail, and trunk. That means to pursue their issues through several possible sources at once, at each site saying, "I'm not sure you can help with this problem..." He might not get the problem solved, but he'll get advice on what to do which may be different than another office is telling him, and which may prove fruitful. THE CHAPLAIN'S OFFICE knows alot about who can advocate for your sailor, and should be called in messy situations.

Third:
The details matter and should be kept track of. KEEP A LOG: EVERY TIME HE SPEAKS TO SOMEONE, NOTE THE DATE, TIME, AND IDENTITY OF WHO!
When told he'll be called back or to come back "later," he should always ask, "When should I expect that call?" "So, if I don't hear from you by Friday, then I should call on Monday?" "When you say 'later,' that would be exactly what date?"
Also keep a note of what he was told... this proves invaluable and paints your soldier as someone to deal with (because he's not saying, "Someone over at some office told me blah, blah.")

Fourth:
Remember that in most bureacracies, personnel DON'T want to solve special circumstance problems, will try to wriggle out, and send the problem somewhere else. There's an old saying in management, "No one wants to take the monkey off your back." So, your sailor must pin people down and make them take the monkey. Hold them accountable for words/actions. Helpful questions would be, "Then who has this authority in his absence?" "If you cannot help with this problem, I may need to escalate my search. What is your commanding office?" "What help could your commanding office be?"

All this advice is NOT Navy-specific, but is helpful whenever trying to get resolution to a problem and dealing with a large organization. I worked 20 years in a customer service group, and have taught others how to deal with them too. Hopefully, they'll save your sailor some "learning the hard way" time!

Good luck, k.

[Anti M]

Very good advice. Always be aware that every sailor has a chain of command and use the chain to your advantage. I need to talk to your LPO. Your Chief. Your Div-O ... up and up. Be sure your COC is aware of issues you are having. Command Master Chiefs also know much that can be useful. The Ombudsman? Not for sailors, that person is for family members.