Just got a phone call!

[Ri]

so I just got a phone call! it was only like a minute long and he was talking so fast that I didn't really have a chance to talk back but it was better than nothing! haha. But with A School, how long is it? and will he be able to have his phone back and text or call me? any answers please.

[Marolyn]

Just got a call from son on Ship 04, Div 082.  Best wishes to all of you.  You will soon get your call if you have not already.  I am praying for all.

[bluemom]

Seems more like jail than voluntary service.  :-(

Blue Mom

[Anti M]

That comment makes me very uneasy.   They have to isolate them in order for the boot camp process to work so quickly and efficiently.  It honestly is an indoctrination, learning a new mindset, and distractions have to be eliminated.   It is also a weeding out process which prepares them for the eventuality of long deployments and periods of restricted communications while at sea. If they can't make it nine weeks without frequent calls home, how can they go to sea? They are volunteering for something which have the potential to be very difficult, and boot camp gets them to a head place where they can do it well if need be.  

To me, voluntary doesn't mean easy or fun.  That's summer camp.

Sorry, got a nerve touched there.  I'm sure you didn't mean anything terrible and are just missing your kid.

[MDESFRED]

My daughter doesn't leave for several months.  This is the part - lack of instant communication - that I am dreading the most. I don't know a day that goes by that I don't know where she is or what she is doing. Part of that reason is that it is my responsibility as a parent as well as the part that I can't imagine my life without my kids. When I had my kids, I could never imagine what it would be like to have and deal with teenagers, let alone adult children. I have to constantly remind myself that life evolves and changes.

I have read about how the lack of communication affects everyone and I tell my husband that I am completely normal.  I tell my daughter that I am reading and learning because that is how I deal with stress and prepare for it as she rolls her eyes every time she sees my reading all the posts or as she refers to N4M as my new "Facebook".

I know why (and thank you for all your information), I just know that I am not going to like it while it is going on.  I think it is going to be worse because it isn't going to happen over time, just suddenly.

I also remind myself that with my oldest I don't talk to him everyday or know what he is up to at any time.  I think about him and try to let him live his life without my overprotective mothering. I just say a little prayer, that he is safe, and happy, and getting by.

[bluemom]

MDESFRED, you are smart to prepare yourself ahead of time.  I didn't and it was a mistake.

[bluemom]

I guess I should have done a little more research myself before my son left.  Then, I would have known how they operate.  I think I didn't really WANT to know because I knew I wasn't going to like it and I didn't want to be tempted to talk my son out of going.  I'm not seeing very clearly how making them recite a quick script for their one and only call eliminates distraction.  Knowing my son, he would have been a lot less "distracted" if he had been allowed to actually have a heart to heart conversation for 5 minutes.  I don't see how that would detract from the "indoctrination" they "have" to do.

And, no...I didn't mean anything terrible.  I'm very frustrated that there are so few options for our children these days that so many join the military out of desperation rather than because of healthier reasons.  I'm not trying to start anything here...just calling it like I see it.

[29junkie]

bluemom...

It is frustrating if you aren't prepared & sometimes you're never going to be prepared. Hold your pride in the choice he made like a banner & wave it high. This is their transformation time. They need this time to prepare to be ready for anything & learn to turn their trust to their command. It's hard, it hurts & the unknown is scary as hell...but our side is easy. Stay strong so he can do what he needs to on his side of this.

[BunkerQB]

"join the military out of desperation rather than because of healthier reasons" ???

The military is aware of this too - therefore, they are being more selective about the person they allow to progress to bootcamp and more ready to separate individual who are not up to par. I hope your son is truly interested in joining; otherwise, it would be a waste of our tax dollars to process him. The military is not for everyone regardless of reasons for joining and regardless of their reasons for joining deserves our support. Good luck to your son.

[bluemom]

The assumption being that because someone is desperate they aren't up to par?  Yes, both my son and my daughter are interested in joining...mainly because they are desperate.  Contrary to popular belief, the recession rolls on, especially for us rural folk.

"In life you need either inspiration or desperation." Tony Robbins

 

[BunkerQB]

Perhaps "desperation" is not the right word. We should think more in terms of "motivation/need" & "interest" - a powerful combination. Ahhh, the recession ..... I hope ...  that they see the Navy as a glimpse of the the light at the end ... that they give it their all ... take advantage of all the opportunities and appreciate that they exist. We need something for our young adults in area where the economy is going nowhere. I hope they do well. Your son and daughter should check out the NavyDep.com site immediately - get prepared - know what to expect - don't let them sabotage their own chances of success - the sky's the limit. Will look forward to hearing good things.

[bluemom]

Yes.  My son is already in boot camp.  Just got his form letter - Ship 13 (hopefully, that is lucky 13).  :-)

 My daughter has been doing so much research, she is more informed than her recruiter.  She took her ASVAB and went to the MEPS station the other day for all the physical stuff.  It turns out her recruiter misinformed her about a waiver she needed for a medicine allergy, so she is waiting for that to hopefully clear.  I'm a lot less worried about her because she is older, and has already been through a lot of "hard knocks" in life, plus she has done her research.  She's been active on the Navy dep site and many others for a couple months now.

At this point, all we can do is hope and pray for good things.  I'm just venting here on this list.  These aren't things I say to my children.  They need encouragement.  I get that...:-)

[BunkerQB]

I apologize for sounding like I "lecturing" - it's just at 65 I have seen it all. I am extremely concerned for future of our young people. In the old days, you can get a blue collar job w a manufacturer and support a family. In more recent days, if you got a college degree, you can get a white collar job and support an family. Today, there are no guarantees. We have to create more opportunities, so our young kids don't feel desperate to find work. More immediately, I would recommend you talk to your son & daughter about some of the more common mistakes people make - stuff like drinking and driving, drugs, lying, cheating, stealing and don't retaliate (like hitting another sailor no matter what how mouthy the person may be) - the Navy takes violations seriously. I know Craig who runs the NavyDep.com site is very, very good for the guys to talk to. If both of your kids get into the Navy, then you have done a fine job as a parent - helping them find a way of standing on their own feet and getting ahead.  Will look forward to continually hear good things from them.