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Comment by battlebuddy on November 14, 2010 at 1:45am

** (made some changes to this message, delted the old one...think my emotions over took my brain and caused me to have temp. insanity) gave way TMI...so here is the edited version...** Still learning*** The home visit was something that my son set up for me. I was suprised to see both of the recrutiers show up. I had only delt with one of them before...it's a long story but we had a really difficult time getting JTW's waiver... due to some issues with his biological father. The one recruiter has been there for us this entire journey and been very supportive and helpful and I think they wanted to reassure me that they would not allow his "father" to have any information or his address while away at BC. I would blow up like a time bomb if that man wrote a letter and upset JTW while at BC. So there are alot of circumstances that warrented this home visit. There were things that I might not have been comfortable talking about in the office and I think that is why......I don't think that it's required or the "normal" protocal. This kid and I have been through alot of tough times together so it is extremely difficult for me to watch him leave.....exxie....I will be there at PIR...and we might as well cry together...I am so emotional..the face he is leaving has hit me like a lead balloon this week....right now I cry daily..heck who am I kidding...sometimes its hourly...I just don't let him know it.

Comment by bbus (FC) on November 14, 2010 at 12:15am

I leave on the 16th of December. I'm home a little now, since I've been working 12 hour shifts pretty much just sleep when I'm home. At least I've just got 8 more days of work, then I'm quitting and enjoying the rest of my time. I'd want letter in bootcamp though, nice to have some outside communication I'd think. :)

Comment by Darnell on November 13, 2010 at 11:53pm

My daughter leaves Dec. 13. I swear she is never home. She is gone so much her little brother has been giving her crap about not spending time with us before she leaves. She has also informed me that she doesnt want anyone to write her in BC. she doesnt want to be known as the girl who is a cry baby.

Comment by Arwen on November 13, 2010 at 11:40pm

Purplemom, I am one of those tough-skinned moms Lynne speaks of, but I came by it the cheater way. I've been where my son is now, so the Navy held no fears for me, only good memories. I wish this forum had been here 22 years ago, when my mom needed it. She was more like most of you are and I was too excited about my future to notice that she was having a hard time with it. Would you believe I left my poor mom with only 3 days warning?

All I can say is lean on the other moms in your PIR groups, in your A-school groups and eventually in your rating and duty station groups. There will usually be someone out there with what you need, be it advice, information, a shoulder to cry on or a kick in the pants. Somehow we all get through this.

Comment by BBWinthemoon on November 13, 2010 at 8:40pm

tears today :( my son who is leaving in 3 weeks has been living with his grandfather for a while now, so him not at home might be a little easier, although i will never get used to not having him home! He came to his little brothers soccer game game today and i sat by with my USA Navy Mom cap on (first time wearing it, and it was strange and i was very proud and sad at the same time.) Came home to catch up and just sit and cry!

Comment by Lynne on November 13, 2010 at 8:05pm

I wish I knew what to tell you, keep calling the recruiter and you might even talke to the Chief Petty Officer at the Recruiter's Office, but I have learned this, things change in an instant with the Navy. It is a roller coaster ride and you have every right to be angry. I wish I could tell you that you could do this, this , and this to resolve it, but one thing I have learned from the seasoned moms is that sometimes you just have to accept that it is the Navy way. Is it fair..no! Is it right...no!! It just is. More seaonsed moms will be dropping in and may have better ideas for you!!

Comment by Lynne on November 13, 2010 at 7:58pm

One formerly teary eyed mom reporting in for duty. I promise you not one of you could have cried a bigger river than me. I threatened, I pleaded, I begged, I did everything I could to convince my son not to join the Navy or any branch of the military service. Now before you jump down my throat, let me say, my father gave his life in service to our country and the thought of losinng my only was more than I could bear. My son was adamant that this was what he wanted to do. So, I bucked up and cried in private for several weeks.

As I began my journey on navy for moms, I had some pretty tough skinned moms tell me to buck up. I had others who let me cry and and moan. Slowly I found my place in groups like this. I became educated and empowered. My fear level decreased and my tears began to flow less violently and less often.
I began to recognize that the more I focused on my son, the less i focused on my fears.

I began to look at what he really needed. I began to encourage him and and I became more encouraged. I met other moms who shared my fears. I realized that many moms rode the same roller coaster of emotions that I did. That day as I my son left for boot camp, I did what he needed. I put a smile on my face, gave him a big hug goodbye, and whispered in his ear to read his bible. You see on the empty pages of his bible unbeknowst to him I had written him little notes of encouragement. As the car pulled away, I closed the door, put my head in my hands and cried.

Then I got my butt back on this site and I never looked back. With Jessica, Dianne and Angie's help I led my PIR group and we had fun. We laughed, cried, worried, and even got made together. We planned for PIR and the Meet and Greet. We waited for letters and phone calls and shared their contents. We earned our stripes of Navy Mom strong and proud.

You too will take this journey, full of ups and down, challenges and rewards. Then one day you will stand with pride at PIR as your sailor enters that hall and know that everything tear, every fear, every worry, brought you to that point!! You will hug your sailor and another journey will begin. Stay tuned...my phase two has just begun!!

Good luck ...it is going to be fun!!

Comment by Purplemom (Ship 3 Div 084) on November 13, 2010 at 7:09pm

Okay I am offically TICKED!!! My son just came home from work and was checking his email. He had an email from the recruiter in response to an email he sent a week ago! He emailed the recruiter to ask him if they would be able to get together to in sometime this week before we go on out trip as he hasn't seen or talked with him in almost 2 months.
The recruiter emails back that he doesn't have time to get with him and probably won't prior to his ship date. Then he adds that he will have his flight info to him for his flight to ITALY for his swearing in and his flight info from ITALY to Chicago sometime in the next week or so. We were already given his flight info from Germany to Chicago almost 3 months ago. When was he going to spring this whole Italy thing on us?????? So now they are flying my son to another country to do his swearing in and none of his family will be able to be there with him. My son is ticked and so am I.

Comment by Purplemom (Ship 3 Div 084) on November 13, 2010 at 6:01pm

I know what you mean about the "moments of tearfulness". Mine is also never home. He actually was sick this week and had to stay home for three days. I am pretty sure it almost killed him to stay in the house. The only time he went out was to go to the doctors. They gave him a HEFTY dose of antibiotics so he would get better and stay better. The doctors told him he is going to have to get his tonsils out soon as this is his 8th bout of tonsilitis in the last year. He told them it will have to wait until at least the spring when he gets to his first duty station. Wish the doctor had mentioned this several months ago.

Comment by beachbum on November 13, 2010 at 4:42pm

Anybody now having what I like to call "moments of tearfulness"? I am so happy and proud and at the same time on the verge of a serious crying jag! My son leaves in 26 days, he is not spending alot of time at home going out with friends, going to see friends away at college, I have finally convinced him to start going through his room, I tried to pack up some stuff alone the other day...bad mistake! We plan to go to MEPS with him and hopefully sit with him at the airport, he has not said one way or the other how he feels about that. I can't believe time is going so fast! Does anyone know how that day goes as far as the swearing in, will they then be sent to the airport right away, are there other things they have to do that day. I had wanted his brother and sister to go, will that be too much?

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