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Comment by SharonW on June 7, 2012 at 8:09am

Good morning Pam-JG's mom, I'm sorry to hear about your daughter's leg.  It is tough to hear that your child is hurt/injured and know that you are unable to be there to help her.  It is great that you found this site as the women are incredibly supportive and understand what you're experiencing.  

I found it helpful to read back through the posts to learn what others experienced, learned etc.  It helped me to know I wasn't alone, that there are women who care and would share their strength and hope with me.

Bootcamp is tough enough and then to be separated from your division - yikes!  Your daughter's initial reaction sounds similar to my son's.  He did write to us to let us know more about what happened to him, what the treatment plan was,  the daily routine etc.

Hopefully, she will be able to call Sunday.  As in a regular division, it is the RDC's decision whether or not the SRs go to the NEX for calls or not.  The calls are on the weekends as there are doctor appointments, therapy appointments, etc. during the week.  You may find that her mood and outlook have improved during the first week in RCU as she adjusts to the new situation.  I had a list of questions that I would try to ask my son when he had the opportunity to call.  

Two things that my son found to be very helpful when in RCU - keep busy - find something to do such as stand watch, work on ship's staff, help another recruit, etc. - otherwise you dwell on what happened and are miserable.  The other thing is to learn patience as there is an incredible amount of downtime while in RCU.  There isn't any training that goes on while they are in RCU other than reading their training manual.  I know there's a library in the guy's side of RCU but can't speak to the women's side.  They could borrow books to read - again that privilege is up to the RDC's.

Write to her everyday, send funny cards, and realize that she just might not write back to you as frequently.  It seems to be a common 'complaint', as least among the moms who have sons in RCU, that the guys just don't write to them.  It is very frustrating not to know what is going on with your child.  Sharon

Comment by Pam-JG's mom on June 7, 2012 at 3:16am

Hello. This is my first time here. I got a call from my daughter monday afternoon telling me she had hurt her leg and was going to ship 04 div 2341. That graduation would be delay for 30 days. She said that they didnt think it had anything to do with the bones. She was so upset. Crying and telling me she was sorry because she had failed. Asked if i had gotten her letter yet. At that time i had not. My husband called me tonight to let me know we had gotten one. I had him read it to me. I read it again when i got home. The call was very short. I do not know which leg. What part.... or anything. Jessi's letter did not say either. She is VERY depressed. home sick and hurt. Her letter worrys me. its as if she has given up on herself. She said she would call sunday. I hope she can. not knowing what is wrong with her leg makes it hard for me to make sure i say all the right things when i write. I keep telling her to hang in there. It's just a set back. That she's strong and will be just fine. To pray and that we back home are all praying for her. Im lost and feel i should have some answer for her. something i can say that will bring her spirit back up. To be honest I am more worried about her depression than the leg at this time. Any advice would be most welcome.

Comment by Jill on June 5, 2012 at 8:34pm

Hello everyone!  Welcome LindenEmry! And I'm with you, I hate the fact that the phrase "no news is good news" actually turns out to be true.  You are in the company of fellow "crazy" Moms...so we "get" it, whatever you are going through now, and whatever the future holds. Just keep praying, and keep writing.  I haven't kept track of the exact dates I got phone calls, but it seems (loosely) to be about every 3 weeks, but I know that can change too.  Sometimes the rules are relaxed for a time period, then they are tightened up again.  Just don't try to figure out a pattern, cause you'll end up disappointed when things don't follow the rules. :)  And know that things are gonna be ok.

MK, Tracy, and Mom2TJ: hope you are all hanging in there, Mom2TJ we would love an update on your SR....  MK: I just love hearing the pride in your posts for your SR.  Keep it up girl!     Tracy: I haven't heard that anyone did anything wrong, sometimes that may be the reason for no phone calls, but by the time we actually DO get a phone call, we're so excited that we forget to ask why there were no phone calls the week before.

Karen, I've ready your post about graduation a zillion times, picturing it in my head.  Can't wait to hear more.

Sharon, Janet, BoomMom, & Phillies: I heard from Angie last week, her daughter Laura is doing well, and got into the school that she wanted, so that was wonderful to hear.  Love you all, prayers and hugs all around.

Oh, and no, I haven't heard anything from my son either.....

Comment by LindenEmry on June 5, 2012 at 2:41pm

Ladies - Thanks for the pep talk.. it's exactly what I needed to hear. I know that "no news is good news"  but the corollary is "No news also drives the Mom crazy."  :)    I just need to step back a bit and relax...  he'll write when he can.

Also, this group has been a Godsend; thank you all for your care and support.  I am very thankful for finding this website. You've made my introduction to Navy life much easier.  I'll keep you posted.

Pax.

Abbie

Comment by Navy2011Mom on June 5, 2012 at 2:16pm

LindenEmry...  I know it's really hard to live by (remembering it is easy, but the day-to-day is always hard), but the "No News is Good News" really does apply in RCU too.  If there was a problem, you would be getting a phone call.  So not hearing is probably a good thing overall -- of course, that isn't easy for us moms, but come here for the daily support you need to keep your sanity.  I'm with BoomMom though, I don't think the phone priviledges are increased in RCU, but there is the possibility that they have chances to earn them.  It seems like they get more phone time the higher phase they get to -- possibly due to mobility issues in whether they can walk to the NEX or if they have to be driven. 

Big Hugs!!!

-Janet

Comment by boomMom on June 5, 2012 at 12:59pm

LindenEmry - I don't mean to sound blase (pronounced blah-zey) ;-) about not hearing from your SR, but like I was told before, the Navy cannot force them to write! Ugh! I know it's not enough, but think about the position your SR is in; so much sadness missing his shipmates; not knowing anything more than what he has to do day-to-day; if he's able to train at all, he must stay aware of his limitations because he doesn't want to strain his tendons any more. Prolonged or re-injury could make him stay longer or worse. My son's reason for not writing was that there was really nothing to write about! Yeah, right! Like I cared about THAT! lol But that has been the case all this time.

They do get phone privileges, but I've mostly heard about "meritorious" calls (where the SR or a group does well on something). It definitely is NOT a regular "expected" privilege. One way to find out might be to write to him and either keep you updated every week (threats to my son only worked for a little while <wink!>) or sign the waiver form (he should know about it or, at least, know where to ask) that will allow you to get information from them. I think you contact the Public Affairs Office, and they get the info from RTC. I wish I had those numbers available, but it's been so long that I don't know where to look anymore! lol Sorry.

Don't stop writing, mom; he needs to be sure that you're still there because you're his only dependable connection to the outside world! I go on, week after week, hoping for that letter on Thursdays OR, if no letter comes, there's the weekend when he MIGHT call.......and that usually takes me all the way to Monday, when I think, maybe THIS Thursday! Sheesh! I hate no knowing, too......sigh! I think you need a hug {{{LindenEmry}}}

Comment by LindenEmry on June 5, 2012 at 11:36am

Do the SR's have more phone priviledges when on ship 4? I would like to know my son's progress (like what phase of recovery/therapy) or if is going back to complete his BC. No letters or updates.... I hate not knowing.... sigh.

Comment by boomMom on June 2, 2012 at 2:00am

Karen - How wonderful for ALL Patrick's parents to be there for his graduation from BESS! My husband, who's an ex-submariner (sonar), was telling me that there were other schools BEFORE his A school, but I can't remember what they were. All I remember was that he had gone back to San Diego (where he went to boot camp) after Groton. But, since the Navy seems to have centralized their processes, maybe Patrick gets to stay at Groton. Hopefully. How's Patrick's ribs? I would figure they would be a bit bruised with all our hugs! lol  Too bad about not getting to take him home; that would have been GREAT! Have MORE fun and take pics (no names) <wink!> if you can!

Tyelersmom - OMG! No, I haven't had experience, but I had heard that sometimes when the heaves of vomiting are so violent, it might tear at some blood vessels in the throat. So, it might not be in his stomach at all! I really hope that it is nothing to worry about, though I'm glad the Navy is taking the cautious steps. Big hugs to both you and your SR!

Comment by Mom2TJ on June 1, 2012 at 9:15pm

I just found out that my son has been vomiting blood (it has happened a few times) so they are doing some blood work and sending him to see a gastroenterologist to see why.. I am soo  worried.. He  doesnt want to get sent home after all this for that... he said he would be so mad if that happens... has anyone had an experience like this where it all turned out ok? 

Comment by Patrick's Mom on June 1, 2012 at 8:36pm

Well, graduation this morning was AWESOME!  Patrick's graduating class had 89 Sailors who all looked very handsome and happy in their dress whites.  Submariners are a bit different as far as their schooling - This was graduation from an 8 week course called Basic Enlisted Submarine School.  He now has two more courses to take BEFORE his A school.  We were hopeful that he would be coming home with us for a week's leave, but just found out this afternoon it's not to be, as his next class starts on Thursday.  I think we're all a bit bummed about that (I know I sure am), but are trying to focus on the blessing of the time we have with him here and now.  I'll update you more later!  My ex-husband and his wife just got to our room to play cards!  Hope everyone is having a good weekend!

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