Deployment already?!?!?!?

[NavyWife2013]

My sailor is still in A-school so when i asked him about moving, he said either he would be stationed on a base or he would be stationed on a ship and i would go to a port, or somthing like that, so when i talked to him last night he said he needed to make some things clear, that he has told me but he wasnt sure that i didnt understand, and one of those things he said was he could deploy after he is done with A-school , that that is wat he meant when he said he could be stationed on a ship. is this true he gets done with A-school, comes home on leave and then deploys? someone please explain this i am new at militairy in fact i wasnt very fond of it and now i cant even think straight with all the confusion! could he be killed? how dangerous are we talking? anyone know?

[sailorwifenmom]

That's exactly it - honestly, I would do the courthouse wedding to make it legal before he's on leave. If you wait until he's on leave, you won't be on his orders and they won't add you after the orders are cut (issued). If you aren't on the orders, they won't pay to move you.

Like I said, it's not a good idea to get married before you're ready just to get benefits. But it sounds like you're talking about a difference of a few weeks or a month or two, in which case, moving it up can save you a lot of paperwork, a lot of headaches, and a lot of money (the Navy sends people to pack you up and pays to ship your stuff then pays to get you there). Otherwise, he gets to the new command and has to explain that even though his orders say unaccompanied (so they're expecting him to live on the ship or barracks, and have to change that), he has a wife. And, since you aren't on the orders, you have to pack yourself and pay to move yourself.

[abbyblue]

so you have been dating his guy since you were about 14 ? I just don't think you should hurry and get married. has he given you a ring ? how is mom and dad feel about him ? does his parents like you ? have you have ideas about working navy pay isn't that great. I wish the best for you but do think you should think long and hard before getting in a hurry. Get your self a good job and save up money.

[NavyWife2013]

i am a certified nurses aid, attending phlebotomy classes, and yes we were 14 and 15 when we got together only a month apart though, i do plan on working when we get to base, as far as parents go my parents love him but not excited about me leaving state, but are ok with it, his parents is who i live with so of course they like me i moved in with him and his parents 2 yrs ago and yes he gave me a ring, the ring he gave me we picked out together because we wanted to do things different and now he wants to do it his way so we have decided to make this ring the wdding band, and it looks more like one anyway, niether one of us had much money when we got it, we had to make do. we have money saved but its not for the wedding its an emergency fund we add to it each check we get, and we have been wanting to get married for 3 yrs just officially engaged for 2, we wanted a big weddin though so we are going to save money for that too. we talked abot this and talked about this before he propsed, i dont think we are rushing things, and niether do our families, our parents are helping us with the small wedding we are going to try to make happen while he is on leave. thank you for your concern but i really dont think we are rushing things we are both good kids with goals and good plans together and some for ourselves as well. im not interested in the benefits as much as i am in him. we love eachother with all of our hearts and i personally have had a hard life and would not jump into things it took me a long time to trust him it was atleast 6 months. again thank u but we are ready.

thank u all for the help i will probably be back on and ask more questions but for right now i think my questions are answered thank u.

im going to go see if i am needed for help or support :)

[BunkerQB]

Sounds like you two have your act together. A beautiful wedding can be done without breaking the bank. In fact, some of those are more memorable and personal. My husband's step-sister and brother-in-law hosted our wedding and reception in their backyard. That wonderful lady & my MIL organized that whole thing. I just showed up with my dress. :)  It was beautiful. That was 31 years ago.

Best of luck. Look forward to seeing a photo in the future.

[NavyWife2013]

i talked to him and he is going to talk to his chain of cammand to make sure he doesnt have to have a chit and if so i will let u know, and we are going to try to do it in about a month if we can get a chit in time, because that is when i will be up there next besides next weekend