Feeling very overwhelmed

[DisneyDebi (02/903)]

 

I just signed up for this and I thought it would be helpful, and on an intellectual level, it has been, but emotionally, I am so overwhelmed by all the things I didn't know.  And more so by the things I know I still have no idea about.

 

My son leaves on Monday for GL and while I'm so excited, I'm so sad.  I've been reading about "The Box" and all the things that get sent home and smelling his clothes and crying and I think to myself, What has he gotten me into??

 

I have so many pieces of conflicting info...like the Navy says to send his banking account info and his ATM card and stamps and writing supplies and money and an address book, etc. but some of the posts I've read say that all that comes back.  Can I send him a phone card?  Will he be allowed to keep his very very small wallet which hold his drivers license?

 

I know every single person has felt this way, I know I'm not the first, I know I'm not the saddest, but boy, do I feel like all those things.  My heart is breaking because I'll miss him.

 

Thanks for allowing me to vent.

[DisneyDebi (02/903)]

Thank you so much!

[DisneyDebi (02/903)]

Thank you Denise - Very good info!  I really appreciate the time you took to write and to give all those great groups. 

I hope I didn't offend you or anyone else with my comment about smelling his clothes....I imagine I will most definitely be doing the same thing!  It was just the common thread and made me cry to think of all these mom's going thru the same thing and feeling the same way. 

I look forward to becoming more involved and connected to people who have already walked the walked and those of us preparing to do so.  It's good to know we are not alone :)

 

[BunkerQB]

You will feel a range of emotions. Not everyone cries their eyeballs out continuously for weeks and months. Some even accept the decisions made by their sons/daughters in a matter of fact manner and go on with their every day lives. We can relate to each other as moms. No matter what, we will always worry to some degree because we are moms. It just depends on the moment. Don't try to be rational. It does NOT work that way. But you will feel surges of pride like you wouldn't believe. You'll drive by a car with a Navy sticker and immediately you want to go and hug the occupants of the car. Other times, you'll say to others who inquired, "Yes, he has joined the Navy. We are proud of him and proud to be a Navy family." with a stiff upper lip, dry eyes and standing just a bit taller. Other times, you'll wish people would stop asking because floodgate for the tears are permanently opened. Go with the flow. Best of luck.

[DisneyDebi (02/903)]

@BunkerQB - Thank you!

[NavyMom93 (DIV: 823)]

DisneyDebi...Welcome! Have your son give you a box before he leave with his favorite cologne and a few things that he cherishes. When you have a bad day, one full of tears, take that box, open it and smell. My son did this for me and at first I thought he was nuts. Let me tell you, I open that box atleast once a day, sometimes more. My daughter is sitting here with me while I type this and wants me to tell you that it will all be ok. My son told me when he left that I should cry when I feel like crying and laugh even more because he is fine and happy. BunkerQB is right, when you see a car with a Navy sticker on it, it will make you want to go and hug them. Be proud of what your son is doing and lean on us when you need to. After all, we are all in this together, whether we are just starting the journey or have been on it for a while. Warm hugs for you.

[DisneyDebi (02/903)]

@NavyMom93 - Wow -- can't explain how good it feels to have this kind of connection with people I've never met, probably never will meet, but are sharing such a monumental experience with me!

You note brought tears to my eyes...but they are good ones :)  Please hug your daughter for me and tell her that I needed to hear that !  My husband had to pull me out of the NEX before I spent our retirement last weekend - Proud just doesn't cover it - and this is what I will be concentrating on...in between those tears LOL

Thank you again!

[BunkerQB]

NavyMom93,

Hahahahahahaha.  I have to pick myself off the floor. My son did that. I just realized he had done that on purpose RIGHT NOW. I was really annoyed with him for doing it because it took three washings to get the "Old Spice" out of the clothes.  He was perplexed when he inquired about the box and I said nothing (didn't want to tell him it was a lot of work to get the smell OUT).  Funny, funny, funny!!!  My son has been in for over four years. 

[NavyMom93 (DIV: 823)]

@DisneyDebi - You're welcome!

One mom here told me one really good piece of advice....just breathe. I'm on here throughout the day if you need someone to talk to. My daughter is the one who holds me up the most right now, she's great. You don't need try to explain, it's something we all feel. When you get your son's PIR date, join that group and then when it comes time, go to the meet and greet before PIR. I can't wait to meet the wonderful ladies here who have and continue to help me.

[NavyMom93 (DIV: 823)]

BunkerQB,

I was crying so hard the day my son did this that I was hyperventilating and holding him so tight I thought I was going to pop his head off his shoulders and that was two weeks before he left, LOL. I guess our son's know what would help us out. Luckily mine didn't include clothes in the box, he knows I would sleep in a shirt if he did and that wouldn't be good for me. What he added in the box were things that I could just hold in my hand and close my eyes and picture his face.

 

I can't imagine 4 years from now...PIR seems like a lifetime away and it's 11/10. Thank you for sharing that, you made me laugh too and today I needed it. Warm hugs for you!!

[BunkerQB]

Sweetie, I've got lots of funnies. Sometimes they are rather pathetic but funny nonetheless. My son left for OCS Dec '06. We haven't had a Christmas with him in 5 years - when he is here, it's like Christmas. Warm hugs to you too but I have got to go and make some money; otherwise, I'd be here all day and all night.