Letting go (TO: Mary )

[gypsy]

Hi,   wow,  I guess there is alot of us in similar situations,  I too feel like we've lost our son,  before boot camp, he met this girl..with a VERY phyco manipulating, mother who literally "took" our son from us they do not want him to have a relationship with us (since we don't approve of her) and we dont approve of her because they dont want to "share" him and the GF is very promiscuios and controlling also ...he allowed it though because he thinks he's "in love"  anyway, alot of heartache and rejection is what my husband and I have lived through for just over a year now, Now, they are already planning on marriage, a month before he's deployed.    we had to stop talking about.."the subject"  the more we tried..the more it pushed him toward her.   I finally..after almost having a break down...let him go...I am going to counseling, I am reading books on grief.   I am reading a good book right now..I suggest to you.." Healing From Family Rifts"  it has helped.   for me, since I have backed off and even stopped calling or texting him so much...he is contacting us more.  They will only learn and MAYBE not make the same mistake..if they realize they messed up..on their own,  My son is in big financial trouble now because of her (plane ticket for her, engagement ring,fancy dinners, etc etc,  and he's stressing alot about that!!   but who did that?                  You have to let it play out...sit back, pray, keep the conversation light and dont even ask anything personal about HER when you do talk to him, just tell him you love him and wish the best for him.  Believe me, I know its about the hardest thing we have had to do, but thats all we all can do.    good luck and take care!!  "Gypsy"