Join the Navy or Go to College

[DENavy]

I have a boyfriend that is in the Navy, in the middle of basic... And I keep debating in either joining the navy or going to college. I have wrote down the pros and cons to each situation. Was wondering if anyone is or has been in the situation& could give me some advice?

[Anti M]

I've been half of a dual military couple, and it can be dang difficult to see each other, much less pull duty stations and work schedules which provide time to be together.  The Navy does not have to station first term sailors together, that's for after re-enlistment, and even then, the Navy jobs come before your marital status.  

 

College is great if you have a passion for your major.  Getting the first two years of basic requirements under your belt is a good thing, especially of you can get them bundled into an AA degree.  Those transfer well into most BA or BS programs you might want later.

 

You could go to college for a couple years THEN join the Navy.  That's what I did.  I found the maturity I acquired in college to be useful in the military later.  I was a flake at 18, but much more grounded when I finally did join the Navy.  Nice being 21, as I was never tempted to drink underage!

 

What do you want to do?

[DENavy]

I am right on the fence with making my decision, writing Pro's and Con's list for each the navy and college that both have important points makes hard for the decision.

I want to stay in a relationship with boyfriend, but the reality of see each other makes it a harder decision. We plan to get married down the road, but i don't know the possibility of being able to get married in the navy. I'm willing to do it for the long run if he is. 

Him and I both know the going to college with make our relationship easier, but going into the navy i will have a solid future.

He is still in basic training, and we need/plan to talk about our future when he is on leave after he graduates from basics. I really need to talk to him before I go up to MEPS.

My family does not have exactly the money on hand to send me to college. Which I've already been accepted to Lake Superior- which is great. Would need to start apply for scholarships and such. But I've also met with a recruiter, and have been filling out paper out into getting my up to MEPS. I never wanna waste my recruiters time. But now the reality hit me and I think I need a bit more time to think about it and talk with my boyfriend before MEPS. 

I know that I need to do something with my life. This might be the best thing that ever happens to me if i join but might be the worst or hardest......

Really helps to talk to someone. Thanks, any more info?

 

[Anti M]

Most sailors do not get leave after boot camp, unless they are in one of a handful of the Christmas/holiday graduating divisions.  I didn't spot his PIR date, so I wasn't sure if you knew or not.  They normally get leave after A school.  Will you go to his PIR?  This is a very heavy topic for such a short visit as that.

 

Angie has good advice, what would you do if he weren't in the picture at all?  Do that.  It works out or it doesn't, but you have to make a good choice for yourself.

[Concernedad]

Just my opinion, but I believe your issues are so varied, you should consider them each on their own merit.

College....great choice, but do you have the money to go? Are you considering a community college to get your basics out of the way?

 

Join the Navy...great choice, but understand you will lose control for personal decision making. You will be treated to the "Needs of the Navy". You will go where you are stationed, and be committed for 8 years of your life. If you choose (and qualify) for a field you can use after the Navy, it will give you great training for your future, and more than likely give you an advantage to those without military background when looking for a job in the real world.

 

Stay with your boyfriend...Both of the above choices will put a strain on your relationship. Your boyfriend hasn't even graduated Boot Camp himself, so at the very least, if it were me, I'd want to make sure he gets through this first. Then consider he will be stationed wherever they decide. If you commit to a school, or the Navy, there is a very good chance you and he will be separated. Have you considered how this will affect your relationship?

 

In other words, rather than writing down a list of pros and cons, write down three separate lists. Then decide which one is most important to you. Then carry on with adding your other thoughts to the list. You have much to consider.

Just my opinion.

[Angie]

This is your life and you need to decied what is best for you!!! 

What do YOU want to do!  Take the boyfriend out of the equation..if you are meant to be together you will...if not than you won't. 

[Janice]

Hi! My daughter joined the Navy almost 2 years ago..met a Navy sailor during A school and married him last year..she is currently deployed and he is Stateside..they talk to each other via phone and facebook when they can..they miss each other alot..it is difficult for both of them, I feel bad for them but only to a point because they knew what they were getting into..another issue to consider is that even tho' you live together after being married, I don't think they have to station you at the same base..the Navy is a wonderful choice but remember that your life will not be your own and like the other advice given to you, do what YOU want to do and what you think will make YOU happy...best wishes to you both!! let us know what you decide! :)

[DENavy]

Thanks everyone for all the advice! really happy that there is this site, so there is people to talk too that get it. All my relatives put their 2cents in a lot. I have considered all the consequences of my choice.  My boyfriend has leave after basic for 10days. I will be going to his PIR, its on oct. 29. We plan to talk, but as you all said its what I want! If it was meant to be then it was, if it isn't it ain't. Either way is going to be extremely difficult... but I don't want to have those "what if's" later in life. Family members of mine are in the military, so i have the feel of a love one in that situation. I have a couple months for decision time, I'm a high school senior and life and the "future" is coming fast.  

[Concernedad]

His PIR is Oct. 29th? You mean next year? Surely you mean Dec. 29?

Anyway, you may want to confirm that 10 day leave after Boot Camp. My son also thought he would have leave after BC, but was quickly corrected. Depending on where his A School is, he may be shipped out late that night or early in the morning.

[Anti M]

If it is Dec 29, he will get the ten days for holiday stand down.  But he'll be in the hole and won't get leave until he earns it back, and earns some days to use.  

[Hannah88]

We just learned about earning back days because when we met with his recruiter yesterday, there was a sailor there just out of A school who said he was earning back leave days by going to the recruiting office with my son's recruiter every day until he goes to San Diego next week.

[Craig]

 

DENavy - Both College, and the Navy are 4 years (alot of times both are 5 years long). So as far as time is concerned, they are both a wash.

But after 4 years with the Navy you will leave with zero (0) education cost. The Navy will not only pay for all of your education while in, but they will give you education money once you get out to continue your advance Masters, or Doctorates degree. Should you decide not to use it, then you can pass it along to your children.

You will also have the experience in whatever job you will be doing. Most of the battle in the civilian world is no one wants to hire you because you have no experience. Not only will the Navy give you the experience, but you will also become a leader.

You will get BAH (Housing), my son make $3000 per month in Hawaii for housing. That's $36K per year that most people  do not figure in.  Does any civilian company or college pay your housing?
Medical - man, medical cost most families $6K or more per year. Then they have to pay a deductible.  Military = Free
Dental - You and your family are free, how much does this cost your college friends?
BAS (Food allowance) - Yep, yet again we get paid extra for food. Will you get free food in college? (Cheeze Whiz or Ramen soup don't count as food)
Gym - Our gyms are state of the art. They are awesome. We don't pay for them.
Vision - Yep free vision
30 days of vacation - Do you parents or anyone you know get 30 days vacation a year? Even someone with 30 years in a civilain company doesn't.
Career Sea Pay - More money again that people fail to take into consideration.
Clothing Maintenance Allowance - Do civilian companies pay for your uniforms? Nope....
Governement subsidized grocery store (commissary) - Our grocery stores are non-profit. We get things extremely cheap. 1 Gallon of milk in Hawaii in the economy = $11, and at the commissary $2.
Extremely cheap life insurance ($20 for $200K worth of coverage)
Legal (notaries, advise) - Free
Tax free shopping (Exchange)
Annual Cost of Living adjustments (~3.5%)
Moving expenses
You can retire at age 38.... Get paid $1800mo for life
Burial for life for you and spouse ($10K x 2), plus child if under 21
Free or near free heath benefits for life (you and spouse, and children under 21 or 23 of going to college)
VA home loans

The list just goes on and on. I just love letting people know that even though our pay look so low, we compensate it by receiving tax free benefits.  Yes, college might be for some, but you will be so much ahead if you joined......and yet, you still get college.  However, at the end of your 4 years, you don't have to payback a huge bill....

Man, I should be a recruiter huh?

 

[Hannah88]

A rosy picture indeed :) But seriously, everyone (including our recruiter) we have talked to says the commitment is closer to 8 years, not 4 or 5.