Unprepared

[mum Z]

16hrs since I received that scripted phone call from my son. Unaware of the "scripted" part and or length of phone call (48 sec). I could hear stress in his voice. Also unaware of being able to have accompanied him to his recruiter meetings for preparation on what to expect after final swear in. Maybe he thought I wouldn't have been as supportive had I attended. Definitely unprepared for this journey. Never been away from my three children. My heart feels heavy. Experiencing detachment with my children becoming adults and leaving NEST that's been built with a strong foundation with walls insulated with ADT security. Now not even being able to communicate with my middle child and only son. I feel as if I'm grieving or had a loss. Emotions from PROUD, SAD, UNCERTAIN, EXCITED for his journey, and LONGING to hear him say "I'm going fishing". Never thought it would be so hard to fold his clothes, walk past his door, pick up his shoes, or not hear his car crank. Wondering if there are other navy moms who have experienced these feelings? Today only cried once and here I am writing without tissues thanks to the support from another navy mom (whose ex navy chief).  

[Liberty]

Oh, thank you I think that I have been saying Sailor Recruit this whole time! It is all so confusing! I just got back from our National Cemetery. We go every Memorial Day( and most Veteran's Days) to put flowers on the graves of a former neighbor and the father of a friend.  My son met us there and I was telling him about some of the Seaman Recruits not receiving mail and that I would be sending extras. He said that was a great idea and then he wondered if it would be odd. Apparently they are already hearing that you don't want anything about you to stand out at boot camp. I told him that I would ask lemonelephant. He always laughs when I say that because I am always saying "We will ask lemonelephant- she knows EVERYTHING! So- it is okay, right? That won't make him seem like an oddball if his mom sends letters for others? Haha!

[lemonelephant]

No, it will not be a problem and will not make him stand out. He will soon figure out the best way to distribute the letters. Sometimes the "extras" will write back and then you can write to them directly. If he provides you with names, then you can write directly to the recruit/s as well. See the Letter Writing .. link for ways to send the extra letters. Look for the blue star.

Thanks for your kind words. I only know things because of the sites and others who have been willing to share info.

[mustang]

Hi! Reading this was like pulling it straight from my head. I'm glad to know i'm not the only one who have these feelings. I have to keep telling myself he's at work not dead. I understand your pain/proud feeling but i too miss my youngest/second son. I think it's hard because we don't get to talk to them and this makes the journey of becoming a Sailor so hard for the parents. I just want to know how he's doing. My son just left on Veterans Day, November 11, 2013, and even though i've read and watched videos of boot camp doesn't fill the void in my heart of not being in touch with my son. I'm trying to take it day by day but it's a struggle. I miss my son being around the house and my 7 year old grandson cries for him too. As i type, the tears are flowing so i will end here. Did your son finish boot camp.

[carafid1]

Hello ladies it does get better the first two weeks are hard then time flies the last week was the hardest waiting for that I'm a sailor call they make a call about 4 weeks before then total silence. Find your recruits division an connect with those going through the same thing face book is a good source to see what other recruits have written home about

[grandmalyons]

Just got a call from my son, he and his division have been adopted by the local  VFW for the day.  Lots of phones and computers available to them.  He posted a picture of himself and friends on Facebook!  The wonderful families who take in our young women and men to share their holiday have sure made this separation a little easier and I will be making a donation to that VFW to help them to do the same at Christmas!  My heart is with you ladies, hope you have as pleasant a holiday as you can.

A side note:  I mentioned sending brain puzzles to keep the kids busy when they aren't spit shining their shoes, the key is to COPY THE PUZZLES ON THE BACK OF LETTERS!!

[Michelle]

Please tell me things got better! My son just left Tuesday, December 3rd. He called at 12:30 a.m. Wednesday. I so extremely proud of him and happy for him to be venturing out on this new journey. But, I was also proud of myself for not being a complete wreck! Unfortunately, as the hours pass and I don't hear anything I'm beginning to unravel again. I know he cannot call me but when can he write me? When should I expect a letter? I hear the first 48 hours the recruits are not allowed to sleep and are put through their first exhausting test. My son is very strong willed and he is not a quitter. But, as his mother I worry nonetheless. Can you give me an approximate timeline of events? Thank you!

[CubanGurl]

Oh mum z. It's gonna be ok,I promise,my son left in dec.i felt soooo sad,everything changed,his room is downstairs,I still can smell his scent,I see his clothes and his valuables ,I have a hard time making His' favorite foods,love that boy a ton.be strong,find things to do.i work so that helps a little,but I do long for that phone call,I'm looking forward to graduation,I can't wait! be very proud,he needs you .

[lemonelephant]

CubanGurl, mum z has a Sailor by now since the original post was posted in August. I'm sure that ThackersMom is also adjusting since her son left a month ago.

[Texas Sailor Mom]

I am with you, my son just left a week ago today.  It is hard to adjust to not having him around.  I miss him the most early morning and late at night.  What helps me get through difficult times is to think I am not the first nor the last mom to go through this

[Tara-Sailor Mom]

I've been there! Still get there sometimes. My son went in almost a year ago, my baby, and we are very close. I ended up in a bad depression. I did what i had to do each day but with absolutely no passion. I finally started to feel better then have had to deal with family illnesses and deaths. Just taking it one day at a time. Dont be ashamed or sorry for feeling the way you do. You are blessed to have had a close relationship with your son and I'm sure that will continue. God bless to you and yours.

[Tara-Sailor Mom]

I've been there! Still get there sometimes. My son went in almost a year ago, my baby, and we are very close. I ended up in a bad depression. I did what i had to do each day but with absolutely no passion. I finally started to feel better then have had to deal with family illnesses and deaths. Just taking it one day at a time. Dont be ashamed or sorry for feeling the way you do. You are blessed to have had a close relationship with your son and I'm sure that will continue. God bless to you and yours.

[Defoe'sMom (Ship 13, Div 164)]

I am feeling your pain. I am trying to wrap my brain around my son leaving in March. I know I won't handle it well as he has been my best friend for the past 21 years.