Not fitting in

[29junkie]

I really think this site is a great resource, but I don't think I'm fitting in well. My son left for BC yesterday and we had know since November he was. I'm not heartbroke, I'm not crying at the slightest thing, not sleeping with his pillow/shirt/stuffed animal, etc.

Not saying it wasn't hard to walk away. I cried. I worry. I'm concerned & hoping things go well, but also knowing he's going to have hard times. This is his journey though, not mine. I'm here to be strong for him & support him.

I guess seeing everyone's post make me wonder if I'm heartless. I would love to comment on posts, but I think my posts won't really feed into the tears & loneliness.....

Any others out there like me just looking for information & friends that are on the same page I am?

[BunkerQB]

It took me awhile back in 2009 when I join Navy For Moms to feel like I had something in common with all the moms who cried endlessly. Now I simply accept that each mom (and dad) feel differently when faced with a child departing for the next phase in life. Looking back I know that because I was still working and really wasn't thinking about his leaving was instrumental in my "business as usual" attitude. I am glad for the existence of this site, especially for the ones who feel that their world is completely turned upside down.

Welcome to Navy 4 Moms. Best of luck to your son and you.

[OKst8Mom]

Thank you! I am a manager in a pretty fast-paced job - no time for second-guessing or a lot of emotion, so I'm sure that's a factor. Am glad this site is here and there are discussion threads for everyone. All the best to you and yours!!

[Athena]

I agree, it is hard.But realize that this his choice, and in the scheme of life not a bad one. I know he will be feed and has a bed to sleep in. Think about all the moms who may not know where their kids are or if they alright. I miss him alot and sometimes tear up, but we have know about it for a year and he was starting to bug me a little sitting around and playing video games anyway.

I am kinda of thinking about it this way. He is on Survivor. But instead a million as the prize, it for his future. I am so very proud of the man he wants to be!!!!We will be there when he graduates NOT if !

Positive thinking and alot of prayers. Of course it has only been since the 18th of June so we will see how I am doing next week & if I can stay so upbeat.My husband can get a little weepy about him being gone.That makes it a little harder .So I just tell him to knock it off. 

[CelticMomma]

You're not heartless - You know that you raised a strong son, and that your son helped you be a strong mom. I'm NOT saying that those that cry are weak... I cried when my son went to the Marines. I didn't cry when he went back to the Army, and I really haven't "cried" with my daughter leaving... Yes, I miss her. Yes, I almost picked wildflowers for her today before it "clicked" that - DUH, she won't see them. But I know she didn't go away forever - It's boot camp. It's temporary... I'm looking for information, some friends, and people from PA or nearby, and some people whose kids are either in the same ship / division... I feel bad for those who are so heartbroken, and I wish for strength for them... But I'm okay :)

[lemonelephant]

I left info for you on your My Page.

[1Bodyprof]

My son knew since October that he was leaving in June.  I haven't been crying either.  Just a little teary when he said goodbye and the next day.  This website is great for info not just "Hold My Hand"

[Publichealthgal]

To be honest, I'm more worried about when he goes to A school. Right now these recruits are sheltered.  As a nurse and someone studying public health, I worry about the potential for taking up the habit of smoking, acquiring STD's, etc. I know the Navy will have talks, but still I remember being young and being around Camp Pen and the San Diego area. Good times, but now I know too much. I just had very honest talks before he left. I also told him if he gets a tattoo do it with a reputable place, Hep C is a real bummer. Sorry for the lack rainbows in this post, but these are some of the real issues these sailors will face once they are on their own. 

[lemonelephant]

They have a LOT of restrictions in "A" School, those things are possible then, but more likely in the fleet after that.

[Publichealthgal]

I'm glad to hear that. I really miss my son, but in a way I like the fact that they are all being watched at all times. I know what you mean, the fleet scares me a bit. But ultimately this is what growing up is all about. I taught him the best I could, and he never really did anything bad. He just kind of hung out and went to school. I guess I'll be afraid of the new found freedom and being away from home. His school will be in San Diego. LOL,  I just told him not to go to Tijuana, no matter how many  friends are going :)

[lemonelephant]

He would have to put in a special chit in order to visit Tijuana since he would be E-3 or under.

[Publichealthgal]

Yeah, good deal! 

[LisaM1022]

I understand. I am sad in a sense that I'm used to seeing my son all the time and whenever I want to talk to him I can. But I have known since about February that he would leave June 23. I know he is in great hands and I agree it's his journey. I wondered if I was heartless yesterday also. I'm more sad for his siblings who are really going to miss him as they are all much younger. I'm just anxious for info and cannot wait to get some. So I believe I'm on the same page. I had a couple tears but don't expect more???