My son just left yesterday

[mamakitty]

Hello all. My son just left for BC yesterday and it's been so hard for me! I find myself crying looking into his room, at the grocery store (not buying his favorite things), and I am even half tempted to sleep with one of his blankets :(

I work from home, and had him home with me for these past couple months since his high school graduation. He was my friend and helper throughout the day and now he's not here :(

I want to start writing to him right away.. can anyone give me advice on things to say and not say? I really worry about boot camp for him. Obviously I can't say that to him though. He has a lot of siblings that miss him too! I will include things from them as well.

Please tell me this gets better?? I am completely heartbroken that he has left (he's our first to leave the house, and to leave to join the Navy really freaked me out at first!!) I guess I'm just needing other moms in the same boat to go through this with!

Thanks ladies

[navymom]

My son left on Monday:(I'm just like you having him home after graduation and he has 2 little sisters that miss him! I think about him all day wondering what he's doing!It's so hard just going to be glad to talk to him or get his letter.

[Shelly]

Hi =) im not a mom. I am a girlfriend but I can still relate. For 5 years we have spent all of our days together. Going anywhere makes me miss him and I see places we went or like you said, even food at the grocery store. The first week was the hardest for me but as time went on it got better. It's still not easy but I can manage. In your letter write to him about your day! Tell him things you do. They appreciate the details of daily life and it helps them feel connected to you and home life. You will learn how strong you are soon. Keep your Chin up!

[Shelly]

Also write every day if you can. It's a routine for me to write every morning and send it off before class. It gets better once you get the form letter with his address. Then you can send all you have. Keep strong and remember that this is an amazing new opportunity and they are truly starting their lives.

[mamakitty]

Thank you. I am definitely writing him and I will add in the details of my day, that's a good idea.

It's hard. I find myself fine one minute and then I could start thinking about him and the feelings overwhelm me and I start bawling :(

Any other moms out there in this situation? Is love to hear your experiences!!

[mamakitty]

Oh I forgot to ask.. when do we get that first 'form' letter??

[CryptoDad]

"when do we get that first 'form' letter??"

Average time is about 10 days. Some more. Some less. No rhyme or reason. Be patient. 40,000 Navy moms go thru this wait every year.

[splash]

Hello angelchristine. My daughter left on Monday as well. She is my 3rd to leave home but the first to join the military. It is different and more difficult. It is hard not being able to talk to them at all. But it will get better.  

[Barbie (Tommy's mom)]

My son left Monday. I've enjoyed having him home since graduation in May also.  His older sister still lives at home while she finishes college.  We all miss him but are so excited for him.  It has actually hit my husband harder than me because they were very close.  We own a restaurant and all of us worked together.  So, we don't just miss him at home.

I have written every day since he left.  I just tell him what I did that day...make fun of something silly his sister did that day...tell him that the dogs are still sleeping in his bed.  Just our "normal" stuff that's going on at home.  I let him know I miss him, but tell him more how proud I am of him and can't wait to see him in that uniform! 

We are also a family of faith so I always add one or two Bible verses because I know they will encourage him. 

Other suggestions I've read is printing family pictures on the paper that you write your letter on.  Have them as a border or a corner of the paper.  Since they don't have a lot of storage to keep regular pictures, that's a way he could still see his siblings when he get mail.  Just a thought.

Hang in there...feel free to add me as a friend.  We'll most likely be at PIR together!

[Lauren]

When my husband left for OCS I wrote 3 drafts of his fist letter, lol. Looking back, that seems kinda silly. But I didn't want him to know my world was falling apart! He later told me I should have just been honest. Tell your son you miss so much. The grocery store was a big deal for me too. My husband is British, so I imediatly went out and bought PT sauce. I also wore his clothes all the time. Its okay. Your son will think those things are sweet! 

Write to him all the time. They love getting mail! Sometimes I would write twice a day! 

It gets *a little* better. The first two weeks were the hardest for me. The crying all the time eventually stopped, although I would have my bad days. 

Remember, he is coming back! You will see him again. I always had to tell myself that. You will be in my thoughts today. 

[Kathleen]

My son just graduated BC last Friday.  All I can say is write as often as you can. I wrote everyday as did my daughter.  Typically, they receive no outside news or sports. My son is one of my best friends and not being able to see him, talk with him, etc. was a true test.  BUT....seeing him at graduation and sending him off to Nuke A school the next day was fulfilling !!  I am so proud of all of the recruits and sailors for their decision and dedication.

[angee925]

Hello. I am in your boat!! My son left for bc Oct. 2. He was my first to leave home and he was homeschooled half his life! All I can say is my hub and I were a wreck for 3 days! Day four I started feeling better. This site helps and knowing what my son does day to day helped. http://callsforrecruits.org/navy-boot-camp-day-to-day/ This link (hope its ok to post) talks about day to day. Anyway, the 5th day I got his belongings. (teared up but didn't cry!!) I lwas hoping for address,(I know its too soon but a mother can hope) but, no, not here yet! I'm on day 8 and I hope I will get mail soon. So hang in there!

[tina41]

hello all!!

my son has been in the navy now for 3 years.  missing them of course never stops!!  for some ideas about what to write in your letters:  your regular everyday things (how work was, what you had for dinner, any family member or friend they might know that you talked to), sports (my son likes the dolphins, I still send him info).  what ever you write keep it positive!!!  encourage them!!  don't write about sad things or things you think they will get upset about.   they are being put through a lot!!  I hope this helps!!