Too soon to freak out! (??)

[KYNavyMomma]

I just stumbled upon another post and the first thing I saw was "I'm cleaning and rearranging furniture, freaking out"... that comment struck home with me. I thought I was nuts, and my whole family thinks I am losing my flipping mind!  I have two sons in DEP, one leaves in July, the other in September. I am slowly but surely going nuts. I cry all the time, I feel as though I have this huge bucket list of things that We need to do as a family in the next few months. I somehow always seem to forget what those things are though :)  I get frustrated after work when I go home and the boys are working or out with their friends, so I clean, clean and clean some more.  I have rearrange all the furniture in our house, more than once. I keep telling my husband I'm "spring cleaning".  I realize I'm probably just in the early stages of "freaking out", (times 2), but my kids and hubby have to think I'm nuts. I need to stay busy, I guess. I have a million things on my mind all day at work (last family photos, last family vacation, etc...).  I feel as though I am just not quite finished with my boys yet.  So many things I need to tell them, show them, teach them, remind them of.  So many more hugs and not enough time. 

[Concernedad]

LOL! Is there a right time to freak out?

We all handle our kids going off to Boot Camp in different ways. Keep reminding yourself they are safer there than at a college fraternity house. 

I know the frustrating part is having no control over them any longer, or even being able to contact them when you like, but the time goes quicker than you might think, and I believe they come out better than when they went in. 

My son is in Bahrain and been in the Navy for over 3 years now and there are still times I wish he could come home to visit, but this is the path he chose. What you will soon learn is that both they and you, are stronger than you think. Hang in there. Do things with them while they're home. But understand they also have their own list of things they want to do before they leave. 

[KYNavyMomma]

You are so right about the fact that they will be much safer than in a frat house! My younger son recently was offered an NROTC scholarship, yet, he said he has no desire to do "4 more years" right now, so he is turning it down.  As proud as we are of him, the school is 800 miles away, and there are so many things that he could have gotten mixed up in- college life in general.....kinda relieved he stuck with his plan to enlist.

[judy r]

Breathe mom just a deep breath hold and exhale slowly....I have sent 2 to boot now that was in the 1984 1988 this site wasn't here so I had no idea what was going to happen or what was going on and I sometimes think that is better. but your guy made a great choice and you get to go along...yeah maybe not to boot but who wants to workout like they will at our ages lol...This is the start of what can be a great ride you will be in his pocket so to speak and when he sends back pics you will see what he sees make a scrapbook start with his swearing in and letters from boot after you read them 30 40 times add the pics from a school and then his travels you are there..it works and it helps.. I always told my guys the first night home and the last night home are my nights anything between is yours.  Oh by the way my oldest retired after 22 yrs as a SWCC and the youngest is still in he is a CWO(Chief Warrant Officer).

[Concernedad]

WOW Judy, nice resume's for your sons. 

My son always tells me the Warrant Officers are the studs of the Navy. And being in SWCC is no easy task either. Sounds like whatever you did, it worked well. 

[judy r]

Thanks dad the guys did it I just held my breath lol and went along for the ride it has been awesome. I have been to  the Artic circle England Scotland Finland France Egypt the Holy Lands Afghanistan Bahrain the Carribean and never left home have had a great trip so far and in Sept of 2018 it will finally come to a halt as the CWO retires with 30yrs of service.

[KYNavyMomma]

Hope things are going ok with you, as of now he has surely begun boot camp!  Hang tough.

[Winston]

I think for you, the fact that both your boys are going is making it slightly worse. But, look at the silver lining....... once one has finished bootcamp the other will be starting and when bootcamp is over, you are back to open communication and I can't tell you how much better that feels. The one thing I kept thinking is how much better off ours was than being at college. He just wasn't college material and I knew he would get in all sorts of trouble, so I kept this upper most in my mind. Ours is now on an aircraft carrier a very long way from home and been away a long time, contact is limited, but I don't worry so much. I feel like he's being taken care of, he's being paid to do a job he loves, this was his choice and for him it was a great one. He left for bootcamp 4 days after turning 18, was in bootcamp over the holidays and since then has had his 19th birthday on the other side of the world. Could not be more proud of him. Our younger one wants to go to a 4 year college, and that's a great choice for him too, they are all different. Be proud, so proud, your boys will do GREAT and remember, once bootcamp is over, you're good to go - you might even travel some to go visit!! 

Just so you know, ours was in DEP and something came on TV for the Navy with a ship leaving port, I started to cry right there, in fact I'm tearing up now, we are Mom's (and Dad's), that's what we do, we worry about them and they will only know those emotions when they have their own kids. Just don't demand their time, as bootcamp comes closer, you may find they want to be home, with you and Dad. There's no sugar coating it, it's not easy, but there is an end and I can't tell you how proud their careers will make you feel, they are growing up and you did your job, time for them to do theirs now. Hugs to you and them!

[RefuseToSink]

awh. hang in there! My method of "control" is cleaning also. As a matter of fact, the house could sure use me in a little stress right now... lol 

You are NOT alone, and you are NOT crazy. Keep on going, one day at a time, do what you can - when you can, and don't stress about the little things. Whenever your boys ARE around, make that time the best you can, and make it all about them. Learn to play those video games haha!! Better yet, get some sweats on and go work out with them... tell them they have to teach YOU some things before THEY go!

You can DO this! Go mom!

[Chetta]

I feel exactly the same way. Good to know I am not alone or going crazy. My son leaves from MEPS on April 21st............I cry all the time now

[KYNavyMomma]

Hi Chetta.  Hopefully you are hanging in there as well.  I'm sure these last few days have been ever so stressful on you (looking at my calendar now :)

[Michelle]

OMG! as I read all the support it brings tears of joy. My son leaves in two days and I cant stop crying, He went on his last hurrah with his close friends this weekend i have just cried. I hope I can be strong when he gets back tonight. He has always checked in every night no matte what time with a good night, if he was out with friends. I will miss that so much, he is 22 and as a grown man I am still going to miss my little boy! :(

[Angie]

I totally understand how you feel.  My son will be leaving in the summer as well.  I feel that I can't get enough time spent with him, and cry on more occasions than I care to admit(of course, when he is not around).  

I think alot of moms feel this way.  They are still our babies and we have spent our entire lives protecting them and taking care of them.  Now the roles are reversing and they will be protecting us! So, take a deep breath, and know its ok!  Its ok to cry, its ok to be a clean freak, and its ok to just be a "hot mess".  

This site has helped me alot, so look around and no you aren't alone!