Unprepared

[mum Z]

16hrs since I received that scripted phone call from my son. Unaware of the "scripted" part and or length of phone call (48 sec). I could hear stress in his voice. Also unaware of being able to have accompanied him to his recruiter meetings for preparation on what to expect after final swear in. Maybe he thought I wouldn't have been as supportive had I attended. Definitely unprepared for this journey. Never been away from my three children. My heart feels heavy. Experiencing detachment with my children becoming adults and leaving NEST that's been built with a strong foundation with walls insulated with ADT security. Now not even being able to communicate with my middle child and only son. I feel as if I'm grieving or had a loss. Emotions from PROUD, SAD, UNCERTAIN, EXCITED for his journey, and LONGING to hear him say "I'm going fishing". Never thought it would be so hard to fold his clothes, walk past his door, pick up his shoes, or not hear his car crank. Wondering if there are other navy moms who have experienced these feelings? Today only cried once and here I am writing without tissues thanks to the support from another navy mom (whose ex navy chief).  

[Tinamarie105]

Thank you! I just never thought it would be this hard.  Yesterday was better than the day before.  Today I think I took a step back.

[tmpnkc68]

I would say every Navy mom has experienced these feeling, but I know for certain I have. My daughter left Aug 13th. In just a few weeks, although I still miss her, the anxiety has eased. My job duties now, as her mother, are not over, just changed. I write as much as I can, read up on as much Navy and RTC information as I can in order to pass that info along to her, in hopes that the knowledge will make her journey a bit easier. Also, a lot of time planning for the trip to PIR. Reminding her to think about the things she wants me to bring her at PIR. etc, etc. The more I read, the more I learn, and for me that has helped. Also, I have been getting letters, and she has been allowed to make two phone calls thus far. Each call and letter, I feel a little more reassured, even though it can make me miss her a little more after each one. When I read them, and talk to her though.....I know she is gaining an invaluable life experience, that is going to give her a huge step up into adulthood!! Go ahead and cry and don't be afraid to tell the whole world you miss him if it helps you feel better. Soon enough all of that anxiety will be replaced with pride beyond imagining!!

[Tinamarie105]

Thank you!  I see the good times and the sad times.  I am so proud of his decision, I am just trying to get over being the mom that wants her son home again, or even hear his voice in a conversation long enough to tell how he is feeling.  I think he will do well and wasn't nervous at all.  It is just the routing with him that I miss.

[Deb]

I have all the same feelings as you.  I cry over everything and feel so lost.  I havnt heard anything from my daughter an don't know what to expect.  I don't have a address, division info or rcvd anything in the mail.  I was wondering if other parents felt depressed when their child left.  

[Lisa Lou]

Hello,

 We all go through this. Take baby steps and read and use this site .It helps a lot. And remember no news is good news. The first thing is the call that I am here and safe I will send a box with my personal things. I will send a letter with my address and other information. I will call in 3 weeks love you.  That's  one of the hardest call you will get. Remember to start writing ,write every day so when you get the address you can send them out.the letter s help them a lot.

[MissmyLVboy]

I was a basket case...been two years now and the journey has been amazing...hang in there!