OCS in a couple of weeks

[TxNavyWife]

Hi Ladies (and gents, if you're out there!)

My husband is prior enlisted and is transferring to OCS in just a couple of weeks. I found this site SO useful a couple years ago when he was going through boot camp so I thought I'd revisit y'all. I'm sorry if this post is a little long, I like information, and I like to be efficient!

(A little back ground first: My husband joined up enlisted with a SEAL contract back in fall 2012, he DOR'd and chose a new job. We got married the next spring and he was sent overseas to Europe 3 days after A school and our wedding. He's been there for 2.5 years while I'm in the states since I'm medically disqualified for overseas assignments. So the distance thing is no biggie for OCS, we're used to that by now. Obviously the communication will make it more difficult but it's nothing we haven't already experienced) We're just glad it should be the last leg before we finally get to live together. 

• Unfortunately I'm feeling even more lost about OCS timelines and info than I ever did about bootcamp. Are there any of you here who have been through both? What were the differences when it comes to mail and communication? 
• I'm mostly concerned about how we get their address for mail. I know in bootcamp I received their form letter and was able to get his address from that, but I haven't seen anything about that yet for OCS. I've also heard rumor that sometimes they manage to get email before letters are ever delivered to them. Is this true? I want to write him, but I don't know if he'll receive the stuff. 
• Do they send a box of belongings back like they do in boot? Or do they stash it away for them there?
• Did your candidate take a car? We are considering buying him something cheap a few days before OCS (he's going directly there from his overseas station with a few days of leave before checking in) that he can park and store goodies in. etc. Was it worth having a vehicle there? (Has anyone done what we're considering doing? Did that work out ok, or was getting registration and stuff too difficult in that amount of time?)
• For those of you who are spouses intending to move with them for specialty school: Did you look for housing before graduation? Or did you simply wait til grad day then start looking? 
• I read somewhere about something called a "Candio Box" is this a thing?
• Kind of insignificant, but do we receive separation pay while they are in OCS?

If you got through all of this, thank you so much for your stamina and any experience or expertise you have on this stuff.  It's exciting but very scary how much things are about to change in a few short weeks, and then months!

Interesting to be back for essentially a second round of boot camp!

Thanks again, TxNavyWife

Edit: Thank you all so much for your responses and advice! I really appreciate it, and am feeling a little bit better about these things now. I did some research on logistics of car buying in RI (having to get titles transferred, and plates, and dealing with out of state ID's...it may be too much of a hassle for 5 days), and I think he'll probably end up just checking in without one, which is ok. 

[Anna]

TxNavyWife,

She only got to go out there to move her car when she was instructed to and then to get the sword for the formal pictures.  Other than that, her car sat there and waited patiently for her!!!!!  We love her pictures in her dress whites especially since she has her Dad's sword.  They're not made exactly the same any more!!

[M's mom]

TxNavy Wife:   I've been offline for a few days, but looks like you've been given lots of good info here by the others!    I  might only add a few things.  You're right about the hotels in Newport being very expensive since it's a tourist town.  Search for hotels in "Middletown, RI" which is actually closer to the base than downtown Newport. There are many reasonably priced chain hotels there such as Holiday Inn, Best Western, etc.  Although as others have said, since you are a military dependent, you can stay at the Navy Lodge, but it fills up fast for grad weekends, and I think you can only reserve 30 days out. 

You can always change hotel reservations, but be careful of buying plane tickets before your LO passes the RLP inspection and some other things, because a few in every class fail, and thus "roll" back three weeks to rejoin a later class.  Other than Southwest Airlines, the others will charge you a hefty fee to change your plane ticket, so most people wait awhile on the plane tickets to graduation.

My son did not take a car to OCS two years ago, because his recruiter told him not to bother, it would just sit and get pooped on by seagulls!  They only get off-base liberty for the one or two weekends before graduation anyway.  (All that off-base liberty to meet up with sweeties in the movie "An Officer and a Gentleman" was quite fictional!)   My son only got to go off-base one time, the week before graduation. His class may have been given the weekend before that off also, but my son had duties running the regiment, and didn't get to go.  There are always others with cars they can hitch rides with, or there are taxis they can take.  My son flew into Providence airport and split the cost of a shuttle bus with some others going to OCS. 

You mentioned he might want a car to stash a cell phone and "goodies" in.  I would advise against that.  Their cell phones are taken from them and stored, along with their luggage and civilian possessions as soon as they get there.  I think someone in a class near my son's got caught going to his car where he had a stash of food, and got in serious trouble!!!!    Your LO should be sent a list of the things to bring to OCS, and nothing more.  He can bring a book of stamps, (They get stationery there, but don't hold your breath for letters from him!)  and a pre-paid long distance phone card.  They will not be given their cell phones back until they are Candi-o's at week ten, so he will have to call you from a pay phone, and use a phone calling card to pay. 

The candidates do love to get letters, since that is their only contact with the outside world for three weeks or until they are allowed email.  As others have written, letters ONLY in plain envelopes.  Make sure anyone you give your LO's address to knows this so they don't send "contraband" and get him in trouble before he's allowed to receive Candi-o boxes at week ten.

Good luck to your husband, and hope you will get to be together after OCS!

[TxNavyWife]

M's mom, thanks for the detailed response! We are probably going to pass on the car thing due to logistics of buying out of state on limited time will be difficult. I have read on other forums (like airwarriors) from recent and current OC's that they occasionally have the opportunity to go check on their "personal property" which is why he was considering it. Officers on his base also recommended it. He will be ok without one though. 

Thanks for the advice about Middle town. I tried to look for places that weren't so expensive, but not too far for next weekend when I meet him up there, but couldn't find anything under $200 a night that was closer than Providence airport basically. Hopefully I'll be able to find something better for his graduation weekend. I may even go up a weekend early to get a feel for the city, since his Supply School will be in RI. So maybe an early reservation for that will help get a reservation on base.

We will see! Until he's for sure graduating there will be no real plans, only theoretical options. 

Thanks again for your advice!

[M's mom]

TXNavyWife:       Hotels in the Newport/Middletown area are very expensive in the summer during the high tourist season.  Since your husband will be graduating from OCS in the fall, you will find better hotel deals then after Labor Day.  My son graduated OCS in September, and we stayed at the Holiday Inn Express in Middletown, which I recall was very reasonable then.  There is also a Best Western right outside one of the base gates where my son stayed the night before he reported to OCS.   I believe the Navy Lodge on base is the best deal if you can get a reservation there.

[Anna]

Very true!!!  We stayed at the Best Western for our daughter's graduation in September.  It was a nice hotel, very close to base and reasonable at that time.

[CindyN]

TxNavyWife: I will try to not repeat any of the good info you have received. 

Someone provided the correct address in this thread.  If your husband's class is divided in 2 companies, he will likely have that information to give you on that last phone call (or voice mail if you are on the plane). But if he doesn't provide it, don't worry.  Just use their class number, XX-15.  The letters will get to him.

I imagine you have access to your husband's or joint accounts, bills, etc.  If not, you will want to get access before he heads to OCS.  He will be offline for 9 or so week.  Even if you have bills set up for automatic payments, you may want to keep an eye on it to ensure it happens and there are no surprises later. 

It sounds like the car question has been decided. I will mention that I think they have an opportunity to go to the NEX once a weekend to get haircuts and other needed items (toiletries, items needed for the various inspections, etc). I am guessing that they are able to get a snack or a favorite drink at that time, however I don't know that for certain.  So having a place to stash goodies is not likely needed and as someone suggested, probably not wise anyway.

My son is currently in OCS and I have not heard that anyone has gotten any extra attention or grief from the DIs for receiving a lot of letters.  I do believe they do not receive any mail for the first week but I would still send letters as often as you would like. That way they will have a few letters waiting for them at that first mail call.  I found sending letters therapeutic for me and he enjoyed getting news from the "outside".  My son requested that I send "current events".  I felt a bit silly doing that at first. I later got the impression that having current event news gave them something to talk about when they have some down time on weekends and more of a chance to interact with others in their class and the classes around them.

Best of luck to you both during this transition!

[TxNavyWife]

Yes, he did! He flew in from Italy, and I flew in from Texas. We spent about 5 days together then I dropped him off Sunday morning and flew home. 

[M's mom]

Welcome T's momma!    This is M's mom!    

When my son went to OCS, (Has it really been 4 years ago now?), they had to buy a stencil kit at the Navy Exchange store (NEX) the first week there and stencil their names in all their uniforms, Tshirts, etc.  It has to be done a certain way, so I would say he should NOT label them before he goes.

If you do Facebook, search for a group that might be set up for the families of your son's OCS class.   Search FB for something like "Navy OCS Class XX-XX Friends and Families" or some such wording, where XX-XX is his class number.  My son started around Father's Day in 2012 and his class was 16-12, so maybe your son's class # is 16-16 or close to that.  His recruiter should know.  These are private FB groups and you have to ask to join.  There may not be one set up until his class actually starts. You can also visit the "Officer Training Command Newport" ( "OTC Newport") Facebook page where they post pictures and news of the current classes in training, or at least they used to--- I haven't looked at it for a long time.  I'm not trying to drive you away from us here on N4M's, but the Facebook groups can be a great source of support also!

I remember the feeling of not being given much information about the details when my son left for OCS, so I found this site to be a great help. Read as much in the discussions and the general forum for "OCS Graduate Moms" as you can, and we may have answered many of your questions already.  If not, just ask!

[TxNavyWife]

Happy to help! 

My husband did not put his name on anything when he went in. I'm not sure how they handle laundry, but they have a system and it works. He should just bring what is on his list and listen to directions when he gets there. Everyone will be in the same boat.

the 12 weeks will go by insanely fast, just go about your business as normal, and write him a couple times a week. I wrote my husband every day, but he got to where he was so busy with his school he didn't have the time to read all the letters. At some point they do get email though, so he should take family and friend's email addresses with him. 

I'm actually working at the uniform shop that issues all of the OCS student's uniforms. It's an interesting process seeing a little bit of it from the inside! Everyone involved in the process from the chiefs, to the ladies in the tailor shop, care a lot about each and everyone of the students who comes through. Your son may be miserable for a few weeks, but he will be in good caring hands.  

Definitely check out the facebook group for his class. (These groups are made by the family members of the students, so they are unofficial and someone must take liberty to start one) There may not be a group set up til it starts, or a couple weeks in. However, those groups you get a chance to speak with people whose family members are in the same class. They're great for questions about the class and support. People post pictures of fancy letters, candio boxes, and fancy dresses for Hi Moms. The official Newport Training Command page will also put up pictures every week or so, so you might get to catch a couple of your son!

I always told my husband, that even if it's a bad day, or the week is dragging, everything there is temporary, just keep chugging along, and it will end eventually. 

[M's mom]

T's momma:  TxNavyWife made a good point in her reply that your son should take with him, or better, memorize, the email addresses of family and friends.  When he gets email privileges about week four, they will be emailing from a closed military server and will not have access to their usual email program "contacts list" and will have to type the full email address in.

Along the same lines, make sure he has your phone number memorized, because his cell phone will be taken from him as soon as he arrives, and stored until he is allowed to have it again about week ten.  If you want to receive a phone call from him the first 24-48 hrs, he must call from a pay phone with a pre-paid phone card, and must know your number.  Many people these days don't remember phone numbers!  They just scroll down to "MOM" and poke the name!

Make sure your son is prepared by memorizing all the Navy knowledge that his recruiter should have given him.  He will regret it if he arrives unprepared.   Also prepare him mentally by telling him he WILL get yelled at, and probably unfairly punished, and do very many extra pushups for trivial offenses, but he must just accept it and he MUST NOT QUIT no matter what!!!   The drill instructors mess with them on purpose to see who is willing to stick it out and who gives up. 

[M's mom]

T's momma:  I'm glad you're preparing your son mentally!  In every OCS class, there are a few who don't seem to have a clue what they're getting into, and after a week or so of "abuse," they just quit, after all the hard work it took to get into OCS!    Tell your son, the first 4 weeks are the worst, if he can just survive that.  After they pass the big Room, Locker, and Personnel (RLP) inspection at week 4, they usually get email privileges.  Tell him to take RLP very seriously, (They even inspect their shoelaces for even length!) because if he fails that, he will be "rolled" back to the new incoming class and must start over, thus adding three weeks to the ordeal.   If he does roll, though, it is discouraging, but not the end of the world.  Almost all of the ones who roll, go on to graduate just fine, so also prepare him for this possibility.

Before they are allowed email, the only contact they have with the outside world is snail mail letters from home, so write uplifting letters to him frequently.  Make sure you send letters only in plain white envelopes. --no goodies, no gifts, no musical cards, no decorated envelopes.  Some drill instructors don't even allow loose photographs to be sent.  (Copy photos and cartoons into a word-processed letter instead.)   After week ten, you can send a box of as many goodies as he can eat, but not until then.  Make sure all friends and relatives to whom you give your son's mailing address know this, so they don't send him any "contraband" and get him in big trouble! 

[CindyN]

My son went through OCS a year ago and he said there is no need to label the clothes that they bring to Newport. The candidates do their own laundry. Best of luck getting him ready to go!