Officer Candidate School

[egbot]

On May 9th, we're bringing our son to Rhode Island where he will start OCS.  Is this the same as Boot Camp? He showed me a video of what they go through and the culmination of the 12 or 13 weeks with the Hi Moms graduation ceremony.  I guess then the work begins because he wants to work on a submarine and do something with nuclear propulsion.

I know he can't bring much to OCS, but I have so many friends and family that want to "do something" for him and I don't know what to tell them.  He can't really use anything. When he finishes with OCS, will he then be able to own anything? A Laptop? A cell phone?

Also, while in OCS, how does he communicate with his family?  Is it only by letter writing?  That would prove to be interesting as he's not much of a letter writer and I may have to tie one hand to a pen and another to a piece of paper just to remind him to write home on occasion!

We are so proud of him. This process seemed to take forever!

Any insights? Words of Wisdom?

We're having a "sendoff" party for him on May 2nd. I've ordered a cake in the shape of a submarine!

Thanks for helping out!

Ellen

[Mia the US Navy wife]

Thank you lemonelephant for all your very insightful information.  This really put everything into prospective.  I am not sure, i like it, but what to do at this point.  I guess it is too late to disagree.  I have to go along.... I have to get used to of this idea, otherwise, you can really go crazy!!!!  I am going to sleep now, so long and take care!!!!!  Marika.  

[lemonelephant]

You are very welcome.  Sleep well. (((((Marika))))) that's a cyber hug for you from a Navy Mom to a Navy Wife--we're all family now.

[Saipan]

I"m sorry that you were given misinformation Marika but better you find out sooner rather than later right?  Have you spoken with your husband lately?  I suggest the next time you speak, you ask him as he may be under the same impression as you.  Also, if this is what the recruiter has been telling him he/she should be reported as I'm wondering if the recruiter was just trying to keep him from the officer recruiter (if he was eligible for OCS he would have had to go see a different recruiter thus, taking that "quota" away from the one he enlisted under).  Hopefully he will be able to get the C school he wants but as of right now, it seems that the only thing he's definitely going to do after BC is HM A school.  I just wouldn't have been financially responsible for the Navy to send him to BC first and then OCS right afterwards, not to mention bass ackwards, considering they pay him for his training if he was eligible he definitely would have gone straight to OCS.  Bunker's comments are right plus she had a son who went the OCS route.  Encourage him to keep applying once he becomes eligible in the Fleet.  You keep saying he has "higher education", is that the entire 4 yr degree or some/more college than others younger than him would have?  If he has the full BA, I would definitely think about reporting the recruiter or at least look at that option.  There is a member on here (Angie) that was a Navy career counselor, who's sole job was to counsel Sailors on their careers and options so perhaps she will be along with some other options your hubby may be able to take.  Once he is done with schooling, you will be on his orders when they send him to the Fleet (general Navy population if that explains it better) so you would be able to move with him.  C schools are generally not given until already in A school, they need to see how/what they excel in, if at all.  I had no idea I was going to get a C school until 3/4 of the way through my A school and it was electrical of all things! LOL But I "apprenticed" I guess you could say in diesel mechanics so that's what I stayed with.  Lemon is correct below, A school isn't long enough so he will being doing that on his own unless you want to move there on your own accord and with no reimbursement from the Navy for doing so.  You CAN just up and go there, technically, but hubby may or may not be allowed to live off base but he will be allowed to communicate with you way more than in BC so it won't be so bad!  Good luck and feel free to ask more questions Mariska.

[BunkerQB]

Officer Candidate School. The applicant must be a college graduate.

He wouldn't be going from A school to OCS. NO.

He might be encouraged to apply for the STA 21 program but entrance is not automatic. The application process is long and hard. He would be applying to a program which sends him to a college to obtain a degree. After which he applies to the OCS program. Some apply two to three times before getting in the STA21. Some never get in. This is for enlisted personnel who are NOT college graduates.

OCS (commissioned officers) and enlisted are on different tracks. Different recruiters.

Now if your husband is a college graduate already, he might have been encouraged to get into the Navy first as an enlisted, then apply for acceptance into the OCS program.  Maybe there wasn't a slot open in his field or ??? whatever, the recruiter thought he wouldn't qualify for the OCS program immediately.  NOTE: many college graduates do not want to be officers. I have encountered a few who are happy (and doing well) as enlisted and prefer to leave all that paperwork (that comes along with being an officer) to others. 

Either way, Marika - he is off to a good start. It's OK that he is older going in. He is more mature and will be able to deal with the stress better. 

As for joining him - must depends on the length of his training at a given place. Housing situation is different for every post. In this area - the others here will have better answers for you.  I don't recall any wives joining their officer husbands until the officer was assigned to a place for at least a year for training like Nuke Power school or the directly to the fleet right out of of OCS (there were some not in the Nuke Program who went right out to the fleet, a boat right out of OCS). 

It is not easy to be a military wife. But you will find a lot of support. One thing I do know is that your support of your husband is very important. He needs you to stand behind him.  And we are here to stand behind YOU.

[BunkerQB]

Thanks. Forgotten about that.

Wait. I remember my son mentioning there were guys from NROTC at OCS. Maybe the ones from NROTC go directly to OCS for training (12 weeks) and don't have to apply (as oppose to regular college graduates).  Can you check on that? Have to go to work.

[Mia the US Navy wife]

Dear BunkerQB,

You ladies are great and i really do appreciate your involvement.  I am brighter and brighter, you both are my lifeline, because there is no other way, i could find this out!!!  God be with you and your family!!!  Marika.

[Mia the US Navy wife]

Thank you very much Lady Hamilton.  I really appreciate your response,

Take care and God Bless You!!!!  Marika.

[Saipan]

Might I please add that I love your name!  

[Mia the US Navy wife]

Thank you Saipan.  Are you a mother, wife of a SR in BC or already a Sailor?  Where is your knowledge coming from?   I envy you and and admire at the same time!!!  I hope some day, i will be in a position, to be as helpful to other newbies as i am right now.  I just hope that the lengthy separation will not result in a divorce....???  I somehow do not see, the light at the end of the tunnel, for us to be together anytime soon.  I really do not like this part.  Also, because of a very limited contact and time on the phone with my SR, husband, i am not getting enough of info. to know where do we stand, as a couple.  I am very anxious and feeling helpless!!!!  We'll see only time will tell!!!!  Take care and thank you for your very valuable insight into the Navy business!!!!  God Bless You!!!   In Solidarity, marika. 

[BunkerQB]

In the meantime, concentrate on yourself. If you are going to school, zero in on your classes and studies. If you are not going to school, think about signing up. If you are working, find ways of improvement your performance or if you are working but don't like your job, take classes that will improve your job prospects.  I firmly believe that a woman can accomplished professionally anything out there. But you have to take action and focus. There are going to many times that you will be in separate parts of the world. I know many couples who have done it. You will be find. You are just going thru the beginning part of being a military wife. In a year or two all this will be old hat. You'll sound like Saipan.

BTW, this will sound a little old fashion but typically it's the wife who has the responsibility of taking care of the family budget, managing the entire household. So if you are not any good at it, this would be a great time to learn some "life skills - the business of living" type stuff - like cooking, sewing, "light" auto mechanics, organizing paperwork, paying the bills, rental agreements, reading the fine line on credit cards, loans, etc. Believe me, this is the most boring part of "the business of living" I have done it because my husband hates doing it - yucky poo poo. But I have learn to be very efficient and just plow thru it. And of course, keeping correspondence with the family.  Hey, it's a job!!!

[Mia the US Navy wife]

Dear BunkerQB,

Thank you for all of your encouragement.  However, my SR, husband in BC is an older recruit, so i am older too.  I had done all of those things you mentioned above.  I had gone to school and graduated with M.S. long time ago, i have been very busy working for many years now and love my job.  I had always been the accountant in the family and took care of my household affairs and do not mind it at all.  i am very independent and do believe in accomplishments by women.  I am not handicapped by my husband absence, but i miss him and feel very alone.  What's the point of being married and not sharing your life with a person???  One can be busy, ambitious, loves his/her work, but at the end of the day, you come to an empty house.  We are a childless couple.  I have tons of interests, but nothing will fill the void i am feeling in my heart and around me.  To be honest with you i was not really for it.  This was my husband's idea.  He simply felt the calling to join and serve the country.  Which i admired and could not say no to it.  Also, i did not educate myself enough and he wasn't really very informative either.  Any time you love your spouse, you want them to be happy and support them, however, now i see, i do not like it!!!  I hope you understand me???

Take care and be well!!!  Marika.

[Saipan]

Good morning Marika, I am the wife of a Sailor as well as a former Sailor myself so my knowledge comes from firsthand experience.  I joined 13 years ago, as well as my husband who is still enlisted and up for E-7 selection board this year so we are crossing our fingers!!  You will, one day, be able to help others so don't worry about that.  Have you joined Bootcamp Moms (and loved ones) yet?  If not, I highly recommend you do it will be very informative to you.  My husband and I have been separated for great lengths before and we have survived so it's not impossible to work out.  We have raised our 2 children in this transient lifestyle pretty good so far (8 & 10) at least I think they are well adjusted anyway.  How long have you been married?  I wouldn't worry about where you "stand as a couple" right now, I'm sure you are the first thing he thinks of when he wakes up (ok, as well as thinking about his RDC's! LOL) and the last thing he thinks of before he hits his rack at night. Just take it one day at a time.  Take care!