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Comment by Paula (was Capricorna) on October 9, 2011 at 11:40am

Oh, forgot to tell you, my son is home for the weekend!  First time he's been back since he left for boot camp in May!  He looks great and is so calm and confident.  We picked him up at the airport and then went to lunch.  Visited for about an hour at home and haven't seen him since...  he's with friends.  He's 25 and was on his own before boot camp.   He has "soft orders" (not received written ones yet) to report to duty in Hawaii after he finishes A School in November.  Three years in Hawaii!  His instructor wants to talk to him about going to C School, but it doesn't sound like he wants to do that right now.  (It's 6 more months in Pensacola and 2 additional years of enlistment.)  He said boot camp is a distant, bad memory - felt sorry for the kids he saw in Atlanta headed to Great Lakes.  He's the only one in his class to be going to Hawaii (others are staying stateside).  That's cool because he gets overseas pay there and I get to go to visit him!!!  Gotta save up vacation time 'tho.  Wish I could win the lottery and not have to work anymore - just travel the world... 

Tomorrow's Monday - yuck!

I'm cooking dinner tonite for my sailor - he's looking forward to not eating with strangers.

Bye.

Comment by Paula (was Capricorna) on October 9, 2011 at 11:11am

Dear Sailorwifesch - I don't understand your email.  What is the need for a dress?  Sorry.

 

I'm going to be away for 2 weeks plus.  Ya'll take care.

Comment by corpsmanwifeschu on October 8, 2011 at 1:16am

Ugh in the roommate issue and the holidays. Bright picture to look forward to...almost at six days!!!!!

Hubby is wanting me to drive out with the kids for the holidays now, just in case he can't get it off with his new command. But we won't know at all until he reports if he can get it off. If I drive with the kids, that will be the first holiday without my mom like that. She's already taking us moving hard even though it is probably five more months away, I don't want to add more heart break to her already. He may have five days of Leave by then, so if he can get it off, we might go that road and him home.

So the surprise for Friday has been a little revealed. I didn't want to find a dress that was too much and I also didn't want to be underdressed. Hubby had NO idea on how to help direct me other than to ask another shipmate on hoe to describe it. His response had me rolling on the floor. Finally told him to just call my mom and tell her so she could help me. Yeah, I would've been underdressed. Someone suggested what I wore to PIR...no, not enough. The thing that stinks a little, I have to fly with my hair already styled as it starts like 45 minutes after my plane lands. No time to get ready before hand.

Comment by JessicaB-Sailor's Sweetheart<3 on October 7, 2011 at 9:06pm

Yeah I definitely will. It just sucks that all of this is even happening. So much extra stress I'd rather just not deal with. I get that they are a business, but why have room change forms and policies when you flat out tell people you don't actually do room changes? Ugh its all just a mess. These girls are horrible. I have a running document on my computer of everything, don't worry. It is dumb though the dorm doesn't take verbal threats seriously at all though.

 

Side vent: Grant has learned he has to choose between a school and Christmas leave. Our big wedding is on A school leave so now he isn't able to come home for Christmas. Upside: I will be moving out there probably right after the semester is over. Downside: Both our families are not going to take us being away for the holidays well.

 

One of those kind of nights. ugh.

Comment by jpgcharity on October 7, 2011 at 8:53pm

Again I hate to be the pessimistic one, just know that I truly wish things were different for you Jessica, bad roommates can really ruin a college experience. Having said that, the dorms would have to do a lot to move you. I know it seems like moving one person into another room wouldn't be difficult at all but you have to think on their terms. You aren't going to be there too much longer so in order to move you they would not only have to find another room for you to live in but they would also have to find someone to take your place among the terrible roommates. Finding a replacement for you in the middle of this semester will prove a lot harder than finding one between the end of this semester and the beginning of next semester. I know you pay a lot for where you stay and things really should be different but the dorms are indeed a business and they need to make a profit just like any other business so when you said that they they don't really care because they already have your money you are pretty much right. I'm sure they care a little in terms of how they will be reviewed and if they will be recommended to others, but they do need to make some decisions based on profit rather than customer service. As far as the whole military wife thing, we all know it's not as black and white as they're trying to make it sound, you are just as "normal" as any other college student they are deeming as "normal." You have so much more to you than "military wife" for others to relate to. Good move attempting to go to the counseling office though, definitely document EVERYTHING your roommates are doing to you and tell a counselor about all of it. If the dorms aren't taking your harassment claims seriously and they are that serious then definitely take that claim to anyone and everyone else with the authority to do something about it; someone will have to take it seriously. Look up any administrative and counseling/health services you can think of to help you with this, someone has to take harassing texts and threats of violence seriously.

Comment by Paula (was Capricorna) on October 7, 2011 at 8:19pm

Jessica, I am so sorry you are going through this tough time with roommates.  You're going to get through this because you are strong and you are smart.  These college people treat you like a kid because they're used to dealing with kids.  Take the high road:  don't show emotion - stick to facts and don't use emotional language.  Research your rights and insist on their being upheld.

 

 

Vent all you want - you're safe here.

 

Stephanie - how goes the job hunt?

Comment by JessicaB-Sailor's Sweetheart<3 on October 7, 2011 at 5:53pm

I did. I handed over my phone and she read through. Because all the threats of violence were in person, the non stop insults and remarks mean nothing to them apparently. It's a load of crap, really. They have my money already; they don't give a hoot about my well-being.

Definition of Harass: 

transitive verb

1

a : exhaust, fatigue b (1) : to annoy persistently (2) : to create an unpleasant or hostile situation for especially by uninvited and unwelcome verbal or physical conduct

 

idk.... sounds pretty spot on to me. I think the building just won't admit it because then it's a liability for them and it's easier to ignore the 18 year old.

 

Comment by StephanieC on October 7, 2011 at 5:24pm

SHOW THEM ALL THE TEXT MESSAGES!!!!!!!  I hope you kept them. Its evidence of the harassment. Thats BULLSHIT!!! OOOOOO if i were there, id set them straight, haha :)

Comment by JessicaB-Sailor's Sweetheart<3 on October 7, 2011 at 12:01pm

So happy for you Paula(:

 

So heres the latest update on my room situation:

Those girls are evil and just so mean. I talked to management and they are refusing to move me to a different room. Instead, they are forcing me to go to another mediation session with all of them. They said it will teach us a good life lesson, and if they just move me we will never learn how to get along with others. (Uhhh, I believe I am paying them almost 1k a month for a ROOM not a lesson...) So yeah. I am pretty much stuck. So I am going to this mediation, and my mom is going to talk to the University about getting a refund for the rest of the semester and me moving out (however this process can take up to 6 weeks, which barely helps me because the semester ends on december 16th). The girl's have now just resorted to harassment, and the facility is refusing to take any of my claims seriously. Also, they said that I can't really expect them to treat me well and have things in common because I am getting married to someone in the military and the only real friends I will ever have that will be able to connect with me are military wives. They said I should take into account how she feels that she can't get the "college experience" she desires because she does not have the typical roommate and has no way of relating to me. I feel like I am being punished for becoming a military wife and i think that is wrong.

  They are going to meet with the other girls too and determine who's stories match up better. HMM well they have only had the past week and a half I haven't been sleeping there to work on it.... I feel like I am just walking into something I have no chance of winning.

But yeah, after the non-stop text messages and things went on for a few hours I actually broke down and cried on Thursday and went to the counseling office. But nobody was there except the receptionist so I sat by myself in the bathroom and called my mom who then called and yelled at management. This is not the college experience I want either. I just feel like I am at a dead end, nobody will take me seriously, and I am being hit with all the blame for living my life outside of what is expected of me :\

 

I don't understand why it is so difficult for them to just move me into a different room. If I can get out of my contract, I'm moving out. So yeah, that's where that is at. I reallllllly just don't want the extra stress anymore.

Comment by Paula (was Capricorna) on October 7, 2011 at 11:47am

Ooooo....  Chicago in January .....  just reading those words gives me goosebumps! 

Sailorwifeschu - I hope the surprise is something really good!

Sharon Proud Sailor Mom - my son's rate is CTR.  He finishes A School around mid-November.  These were "soft orders" and subject to change until he gets the official written orders.  I'm using up all my vacation later this month, so I won't be going to Hawaii until I build up vacation time again.  More than me going, I'm thrilled for my son to be going there - what an adventure!  He loves what he is doing and is very happy.  I can't wait to see him tomorrow!!!!

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