Medical Help and Suicide Prevention

[Tabitha]

Hello All! I am in some serious need of help or advice. Our son has been doing really good up until this past summer after he was hit on his motorcycle by a truck who ran a red light. Thank the good Lord he was able to walk away from this accident but he walked away with three fractures in his spine and other smaller injuries. Two of the fractures are in his neck and one in his lower back. The navy hasn't been much help as far as doctor care or physical thearpy. He experience muscle spasms that cause his whole body to tingle. He had one so bad last night that he was found by the city police laying in the road. He was transported last night to the hospital. I'm assuming a military hospital. This isn't the first time this has happened. He was told by one of his chain of command that the pain was in his head. :( How could they say this and his x-rays show fractures? Because the pain has become so severe and he isn't getting the care or physical thearpy that he needs he is also becoming more and more depressed. So severe that he called me a few weeks ago and stated "Mom if you don't hear from me, you know I have done the unthinkable." After this comment my husband and myself talked to him for almost three hours on the phone. Telling him to talk to his chain of command about his thoughts. It took alot in him but he did it. His chain of command response was he needed to get in the gym to work on his physical well being. WHAT?????? Now how on earth will this help him when he has injuries is my thoughts. We have also found out that he a couple of times has over done his meds that they gave him for his injuries. This is so disheartening to think that he isn't being heard. He is in pain all the time and is also contemplating suicide. Our son has never been in this state of mind before. Before this accident happened he was a happy kid with a carefree spirit. He has always had a positive outlook on everything. Does anyone have any knowledge on how we as his parents can help him, or who we can talk to about our concerns or how we can get him the help that he needs? PLEASE!! I'm scared to pieces that phone call that every parent is scared of recieving is going to come any day now. Any advice or help would be greatly appreciated.

[anasazigypsy]

I don't have a lot of advice,but as weird as it sounds, I would have you tell him to see a grief counselor for his mental health. This is not a traditional loss,but it is the loss of him being the person he was pre accident. He needs to grieve the fact that his typical young guy invincibility attitude is gone forever. He gets daily reminders of that with his pain.
As far as medical issues, the chain of command response seems to be a cultural failing throughout all branches of the military. And with the added pressure of the opioid crisis another barrier to getting proper pain management was created.
Tell your son everyone reading this is holding him in their thoughts. Once our kid enters the Navy,all sailors become our kids.

[Tabitha]

Thank you so much anasazigypsy♡

[B'sNukeMoM⚓️MMN(Vet)]

Oh Tabitha I am so sorry to hear this.  And it breaks my heart that his command is not addressing this or taking it more seriously.  You should reach out to the Ombudsman or the Chaplain and they should be able to give you some direction .  I would do that immediately.  Where is he stationed?

[Phoenixmom]

Mrs. Tabitha I found this site and it has numbers in it to reach out. I hope this Helps you.

PDF]

Navy Suicide Prevention Handbook - Naval Education and ...

https://www.public.navy.mil › support › suicide_prevention › Documents

[Phoenixmom]

The reason I am posting this is because there have been a few instances that have happened where my Son is Stationed and it is kept hushed but they do speak on this a lot. and the Handbook has numbers to reach out.

[anasazigypsy]

Yeah, where my sailor is stationed also. Also media blackout even when the circumstances were so horrid I would suspect all around have at least minor PTSD

[Phoenixmom]

You know stating that I see a lot of it in My Son...I have brought it to his attention this last time around and asked him to please seek help about this. But he keeps telling me he is ok, just sleep deprived.

[anasazigypsy]

Yeah, mine the same way. One of his coping mechanisms has been to post info on suicide prevention and share the national number. I'm afraid part of him blames himself for not somehow preventing it. But got to tough guy it out. I was afraid of PTSD if he saw combat action. Never dreamed it could come in this way.

[anasazigypsy]

By the way Phoenix mom,my sailor and I are both from Phoenix,and the lost sailor was also from Arizona

[Phoenixmom]

My Son doesn't give me much detail, As he tells me Yes Mom they called us in for a meeting and let it be known. It is such a Sad Sad thing. I cant even Imagine what the Parents must feel or have to go thru. I so tell my Son to please reach out to me your sisters anyone if ever in Need of help. I just cant imagine getting a Call as Tabitha and her Husband I feel so Helpless, as One of our own Mother's is facing this.

What part of AZ if I may ask? How long have you lived here? Me and My Husband were both born and raised then as a teenager I moved to San Jose for a few Years but it was way to fast so I came back home, needed more of a slow pace.

[anasazigypsy]

The sailor was from Surprise if I remember correctly. Phoenix area,but not Phoenix. I'm north central Phoenix and my sailor is out of state. I've been here since 77,so not a native,but long time resident

[anasazigypsy]

Statistics show military above national civilians rate
https://news.usni.org/2018/12/11/navy-suicide-rate-rising-faster-th...