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Comment by Curleytop on September 15, 2013 at 5:49pm

Hi girls,

I had a unique experience yesterday.  I meet another Navy mom in person that had just sent her only son to BC two weeks ago.  We had a lovely visit.  I told her my experience with BC and about going to PIR.  I also told her about this web site and the groups she should join.  She thanked me for the information.  I thought maybe someday I would be able to talk about my 'expertness' of the Navy to help another mom.  I never thought it would be in person or come this soon in my 'Navy career' (ha,ha). 

One of you wrote that we would laugh together.  When I read that, I thought I could not smile or have any laugher while my son is gone.  That is not the case due to all of your support.  I am so grateful for all you.  Thank you for being here.

When I write to all of you, I feel connected, not alone, able to look up and move forward.

Comment by Curleytop on September 7, 2013 at 11:19pm

Kathy, I could not be happier.  News that one of boys is coming home, thrills my heart.  It gives me hope.  My count is just beginning.  Each day that passes just means one day closer to his return.

Barbara, my thoughts and feelings are certainly with you.  We will weather this storm together.  I am going to need you, Barbara.  To keep giving me hope.  It is hard not to let my thoughts run away with me and go down a dark path.  Barbara, that your son has returned gives me hope.  He can draw on his experience and return again.  I will pray for him as I do all the military serving.

TDM, when my son was home, he talked about his group.  Those he depended on to do their jobs.  Those who do their jobs so everybody else can do theirs.  The military has trained him well.  He does depend on his group and they depend on him

Comment by TexasDocMom on September 7, 2013 at 9:21am

Barbara, "welcome back" is just not what you want to hear, but we are glad you know where to find the support you'll need. And I know your experience will help others. 

Curleytop. If you look up in the "discussions" area, you will find my post I wrote 4 years ago...FOUR years! ohmygosh, I can't believe it. You are not the only one with those feelings of despair.  And yep, moms are control freaks, and when you spend your life keeping your children safe, it's hard as hell to not panic when you cannot control their circumstances. Trust that those with him will take your place and have his back. 

Comment by Barbara C on September 7, 2013 at 1:22am

Hi Everyone,

Last year when my son returned from Afghanistan I didn't leave this group since I felt he would be heading back there again. I now know that it is official he is heading back there soon. I guess I should not be surprised when I recognize  a few of your names. Your children are doing the same thing. I believe all of you understand the feelings that I can't seem to put into words. Thanks for being here.

Comment by Curleytop on September 6, 2013 at 11:18pm

Thanks again for the reassurance.  I just feel so uneasy about everything.  Any little thing sends me over the edge.  It is the not knowing.  For all the years as a mom, we plan, we know, we arrange.  Now someone else is doing all that.  It is very disconcerting. 

I guess you can tell by now, letting go is not my strong suit.  I really thought I had improved over this past year.  Much has changed and my son has grown immensely.  But deployment makes me feel like I am back to square one and I don't like it.

I am so blessed that I can write to all of you.  Thank you for listening.

Comment by Tamme on September 6, 2013 at 9:34am

Curleytop, many of the answers to your questions depends on where your son will be in Afghan.  My Corpsman is in a security house way up north with a Marine team but they have internet so he can e-mail and Skype.  Packages and food arrive only when a trip is made to a base which is a helicopter trip.  My boxes have taken from two to four weeks depending on how many times someone makes a trip to the base.  I use the large priority mail boxes which don't hold much but doesn't matter how heavy so I load them down.  I am sure you son will contact you as much as he can but won't know how much until he arrives.  I wanted so many answers up front but had to wait until he got there to really find out how things work. 

Comment by TexasDocMom on September 5, 2013 at 10:59pm

Curleytop, it's going to be okay. Your son wants to share any news with you instead of having the FRO do it, that's all. My son was the same way. Check the website for the unit your son is assigned to, sometimes they have an address there that all you have to is add your son's name and rank.  Start sending boxes as soon as you want, and it seems to vary between 2 weeks to a month to get to them. I'm more experienced with Iraq, so the Afghan pros will have better info. It's all changing as we draw down tho, so it could change somewhat. Keep your phone with you. He will call when he can. 

It's all gonna be all right...you're not alone, and you'll hear from your son as soon as he can do it. The command knows it is critical to keep those guys in touch when they can do so. 

Comment by Curleytop on September 5, 2013 at 10:43pm

Well the news for today is that my son is not going to sign up for an emarine account.  His seniors advised him against it.

It seems that the word is the FRO assigned to his unit would worry me, more than help me with news.

I was counting on that connection to know when to mail packages, know when things like boots down in the USA might happen.  Now I have nothing.  My son texted "No news is good news."

I know I must look at this situation as an open door not an obstacle.  That phrase was in an article I read.  Am I the type of person that looks for open doors or obstacles?  This seems like an obstacle.

Vipergirl, I understand.  The emarine account and FRO were going to be the ways I could keep in touch with my son's unit.  Now, there is nothing.

How did you know when to send boxes?  How long does it take for a box to get there (Afghan)?  How long before they leave for home do you stop mailing boxes?  Do they have internet?  Phone services? Anything?  See, I am in my panic mode.  Sorry girls.  I am just upset about no FRO, but this too will pass.

Comment by Much Trouble on September 5, 2013 at 8:29pm

Curleytop...You will be just fine!  Keep coming here and sharing with us...Once the initial panic passes, we also have a lot of laughs.

Vipergirl...My son wasn't a corpman, but he is married, so the few calls he could make went to his wife.  Luckily, my daughter in law and I are very close, so she would pass messages back and forth.

When my son was over there, a box lived on the dining room table.  When I sent one out, it was replaced with another one.  That way I could stick things in as I got them.  Don't forget things such as childrens drawings, the local newspaper, or programs from local concerts, plays, etc.  You want to keep sending them a bit of "home".

Comment by Vipergirl on September 5, 2013 at 7:47pm

Wanted to say hi to the group.  As with all the other families, I am missing my Corpsman and not being able to talk to him during his deployment.

   

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